How did you know you were 1 and done?

[Sleepdoesntexist]

NC for this.

Basically we always said we'd have 2. But I've not slept in months! The 4 month sleep regression has gone on for 5 weeks and is only getting worse. Before that it's not like my LO slept well either so I just can't imagine how I'd ever cope with a second.

If you didn't always know you were 1 and done, how did you know?

Always been on the fence about having more. He's 6 now and I just couldn't go back to the toddler stage. I feel like I have my freedom and life back. Kids are such hard work I think you should only have them when you wholeheartedly want them. Undecided/on the fence just isn't enough

There was not one thing just lots of little, can't say I actively wanted only one but I sure as heck dont't want another

Multiple reasons really, but the main one was we just didn’t want another. I was desperately broody before having DD and that feeling just never returned - we are happy as we are.

I would say however that you have a very young baby and are in the thick of sleep deprivation. You may change your mind once things are a bit easier (or you may not - and that’s absolutely fine!).

Horrific birth, colic until 6mo, energiser bunny from then on.
Delightful company now, funny, lots of interests.
However, zero broodiness. He's never ever asked for a sibling.
Super happy with one child, he's now 11 and life's great.
I couldn't go through birth-baby-toddler-primary school again.

I was thinking about it anyway, but then when DC was born I don't want my time to be divided. If I did have another it would be when DC was about 6, so probably pointless anyway for the reason of having a sibling for him. Also, I want to be able to help DC financially as I assume buying a house will be impossible for anyone in 20 years, this will be much easier with one. The final part for me is I don't know many people who are very close with their siblings, if anything the opposite.
If I were younger, much richer and had alot more support I might, but in my situation it's definitely a no from me.

Almost certainly one and done for so many reasons!:

Post partum psychosis
Lazy partner
Unsupportive parents (mine)
Costs
I like my job and don't want to be a SAHM
I am glad to (vaguely!) have my post child body back and do my hobby (running) and don't want to loose that time
Space in the house
Headspace
Sleep!

Amazingly, even after that list I do get pangs to have another. But it's just hormones, and it isn't the life for me.
I'm happy to be DDs playmate and can be like a big kid myself. No problem arranging playdates or having other kids here, it's a nice way to get the nurturing side out without having another 😅

Children don't need siblings as such, they need happy parents, as much as is possible. Good luck OP.

I had her when I was 17, so having another soon after wasn't really an option. I thought I might want another once I was older and more stable and financially secure.

By the time I was mid 20's husband and I discussed it and decided we were very happy with just her, and didn't want to go through all the poop and screaming and sleepless nights again. It's also been nice only having to focus on one, having plenty of free time and money and "us" time, plenty of space in the house and no sibling bickering or rivalry!

I'm 32 now and very happy with our cute little family. She's already talking about university which makes me feel a bit sad at how grown up she suddenly seems, but the Devil and all his minions couldn't convince me to have another now! Mercifully she's happy as an only and has said several times she's glad she doesn't have siblings as all her friends seem to hate theirs 😂

Interesting, thanks all.

I think there's guilt somehow in that DH and I both wanted 2, guilt for ourselves, the other and our DC not having a sibling. We regularly discuss this issue, but I've noticed we both used "wanted" not "want" now so was curious to see how others had come to the decision & whether it was conscious or sort of by accident with the passage of time.