DH hinting at second child again?

[GilmoreGirl84]

In the past couple of years I really wanted a second child, DH was against it and I eventually came to terms with it. Moved on, changed jobs, started enjoying the perks my new life as a family of three.

Now he's been dropping hints, nothing concrete but "should we/shouldn't we". I am scared of reopening this Pandora box if he's not sure as it caused me so much pain. He can't quite see that for me it was a real grieving process and I don't want to go through that again.

I am also quite old (just turned 39) and I have just started a new job 3 months ago. The new job is very interesting but the maternity package is poor compared to the old job. As I said, when I made the move I thought this topic was closed. Not a biggie in the grand scheme of things but annoyed with DH for being so thoughtless.

I think DH is genuinely torn and speaking from the heart, but I was so depressed last year and not sure it's wise to reopen this subject.

That sounds really tough Op. Have you told him how this makes you feel?

Yeah that’s a tough situation. I’d tell him how you feel, he should have considered all possibilities before hand especially as you have made life decisions based on one child.

We have an only (he’s 18 now) I really don’t think I could start again at 40. How old is your child?

DD is 3 and a half years old....

@GilmoreGirl84

I really wanted a second child, DH was against it and I eventually came to terms with it. Moved on, changed jobs, started enjoying the perks my new life as a family of three.

Remind him of this ^^: that your new job has a less advantageous maternity package and that, following your mutual agreement not to face another child, you are no longer willing to have another child. It's easy for him to potentially change his mind - it won't be him pregnant, going through any physical problems afterwards, doing the majority of childcare, or having your career/pension affected by a second child is it? 🌹