Feeling guilt

[Iwonderwhatsnext]

So for a variety of reasons it’s looking like DD may end up being an only (I am physically able to try for another but other things are not in my favour).

I feel consumed with guilt about it. I think because I could probably physically have another I feel like I should at least try.

I watch her caring for and loving her dolls and my heart breaks. I think about me and DH passing away and her being alone in the world. I think about the teenage years and worry she’ll be easily led astray as she’ll feel more pressure to make connections with friends.

I know families with one have benefits and she will always feel completely adored. I know siblings are not guaranteed to get on. I know a second child may not complete me or have any real positive impact on dds life. I feel like logically I get it. But my heart doesn’t get it.

I just feel so guilty and i don’t know why.

Does anyone else feel like this x

I have feelings like this too.

I have a son who is 4 now and for the the last couple of years I've felt the pressure to have another one and give him a sibling.

I struggled massively when he was a baby. Traumatic birth, PND and even 4 years later I can't bear the thought of doing it all again - but then I have the guilt of not giving my son a sibling. Especially when we have a small family and he ready has no cousins and elderly grandparents.

I haven't 100% closed the door on it but I'm
Starting to feel if I don't change my mind soon then age gap will be too big. But as each month goes along I still have no real desire to have a second baby.

My son is 8 now and an only. I had a very difficult birth and he was a difficult baby for the first 12-18 months. I honestly couldn't face doing it all again.

I did used to feel guilty but the feelings have lessened over time.

He has lots of friends both in and out of school. Enjoys cubs and swimming. We enjoy our time as a family of 3 and he has all of our attention and time.

A while ago, I mentioned siblings and whether he felt he would like one, he said a very firm no! He has never mentioned it or asked for a sibling.

If it makes you feel any better @Iwonderwhatsnext my sister (who I fought like crazy with from age 5-15, fun for our parents!, but also admired and wanted to be like) introduced me to recreational drugs and eating disorders and sadly I went off the rails for a bit.

I have an only

I feel the same - horrible first year with PND and just don’t feel I want another. Plus now I have an insane medical condition that makes it all but impossible. But stupid as it sounds, I still feel guilty that, in my heart, I don’t really want another kid