Recurrent Miscarriage & When to stop TTC

[Ilithyiaa]

Hello,

First time poster here, go easy on me :)

I'm a mum of one amazing little boy who is 3. We've been TTC but I have been diagnosed with recurrent early miscarriage, we've suffered 8 in a row in the past 18 months. I get pregnant very, very easily! However, the blue lines disappear after 6/7 weeks and I miscarry. I've been through tests with the NHS and everything has come back normal, I'm 31, fit and healthy with no underlying health conditions.

I guess my first question is, is there anyone else out there experiencing or has experienced this? We can clearly have a baby, we can conceive, but I cannot keep them. The consultant I saw when they said they couldn't help me, said to keep trying, however, the physical and mental strain is exhausting, we both work FT and trying to look after our little boy, it's ruining our lives.

My second question is, when do you stop? We'd love to just "stop trying" and if it works it works, but as we get pregnant so easily, it's not that simple. When do you decide to stop trying and how do you come to terms with having one child - our little boy fills our whole hearts and he is more than enough, we just wanted him to have the companionship of a sibling - and of course we always imagined there would be two running circles around us in the future.

Thanks!

Hi,

I had this after my first child - 4 early miscarriages around the 6-7 week mark.

Have you been prescribed cyclogest? If not please push for it! I had tried baby aspirin, had tests…begged my doctor for this after doing my own research and had a successful pregnancy after the first cycle using it.

Apologies if you have already tried this x

Thank you so, so much for replying to the thread, I've been on baby aspirin for a year, high dose folic acid and Cyclogest for the last two.

No problem, I remember the pain and the hopelessness so well.

I too get pregnant really easily, hyper fertility apparently.

Do you feel ready to give up?

A daily injection of Clexane as soon as I had a positive test did it for me after three losses. Have you been having any investigation done? Mine was a blood disorder that I knew nothing about.

I'm not sure, I don't what to look for in a) keep trying b) give up. I feel like if we break then are worse in terms of age! I know, I feel like i'm also very fertile?! I even read an article about it being a problem as your body catching anything, even if the embryo is redundant and will cause recurrent miscarriage - so hard not having answers.

SuperSange - I've had all of the NHS available investigations - hormone check, bloods, blood clotting disorders, blood work and ultrasound. I've even had two of the sacks sent to London. Next up is private after saving, we have one little boy already so NHS will naturally and rightfully so only cover so much. But i'm not sure where to start, we are close to London, but again not sure if to go down that route/IVF or close the door.

Thank you both for replying, I feel so so bloody lonely. I've told friends about what's happening, but don't hear anything, but I completely understand, what's to be said!

Forgive me if I’m wrong, but I don’t feel like you’re ready to give up yet.

My doctor said exactly the same to me - my body doesn’t recognise the “bad” eggs and just bloody let’s all of them be fertilised!

If you can afford it, definitely look at a private specialist. I used to trawl the internet for hours and hours and there was someone who came highly recommended in London I think, I’ll try and find the information.

I really hope you get your much longed for baby, the loneliness is awful and people seem to be less understanding when you already have a child x

I had this (4 mcs) and was treated by Mr Shehata at the CRP clinic. Had 2 healthy babies when taking prednisolone + cyclogest.

I think this is such a brave question and also a very personal one to which only you have the true answer.
All I can do is share my experience and view:
My partner and I have been TTC for nearly three years. I have no children, he has one adult child from a previous relationship when he was very young.
I desperately want to be a mother, and he would love to have another child, but we have had three losses: one chemical pregnancy and then two missed miscarriages in a row where babe stopped developing at 6 weeks but I didn't know anything was wrong until we had a routine scan.

I've been referred to the Recurrent Miscarriage clinic in Manchester, and I will go and have further tests to see if there is a cause but if they can't find anything, my partner and I have agreed to finish our last couple of NHS Clomid cycles and if we don't get lucky, we will stop.
No IVF. No further pills and timing sex and trying, trying, trying. We'll just stop.
Miscarriage is so hard. Physically and emotionally and there is so much more to our lives! Sometimes I feel like I've spent too much energy chasing this dream, monitoring my fertility, researching hormones and medications, and waiting for tests and referrals and I'm grateful for the help and hopeful that it will lead to a baby but I don't want to be consumed by the quest and miss out on the joy in life, you know?
If I was in your position, with a little boy already, I would feel okay about stopping and if that is what you want. And it doesn't have to be a forever decision. You can decide to try again in a few years, or adopt or foster or any of the other paths to parenthood, and whatever you choose, I say good for you and I wish you so much luck and happiness. Xx