Are we doing the right thing?

[krkb]

Hi guys! Help me out! I think i just need a good shake but here goes.... my partner and i have 1 child together who is now 5yrs old. I had a tough pregnancy, which put me off a second child for a while, when i eventually came round to the idea of another, we tried for a few years but nothing happened as i previously mentioned out Son is now 5, we had made a decision to stop trying and be happy with 1 together (he has an older son also). Partner booked a Vasectomy which is tomorrow!! I am now a bit of a flappy mess! Are we doing the right thing??? Will my boy be ok as an only child??? Will i be ok when he no longer needs me as much? Is it normal to feel this way??

How old are you both? Personally I wouldn’t go down the vasectomy route unless I thought I was 100% sure. You don’t have a huge family and it’s not as though you are falling pregnant easily so it sounds like a bad idea.

I think your child would be fine as an only though if that’s what you really want.

I am 30, my partner is 40. I was 100% sure, i just feel a bit jittery about it now which is not ideal timing! I would have loved my son to of had a close aged sibling but now the gap has got bigger i feel like a sibling wouldnt really benefit him in terms of someone to be close with growing up (as i mentioned he has an older brother who is 17, so he wont be completely alone in his adult life)

Your sons only 5 tho and you're only 30! There's 4 years between me and my sister, 8 years between me and my brother and 18 years between em and my littlest sister! I think you're jumping the gun and you don't sound 100% convinced. I'd hold off if I was you

Based on your age I wouldn’t make that type of decision it’s quite major. I’m 29 and my DS is nearly 6 I don’t know if I would have any more tbh... I’m definitely not ready to have that choice taken away from me though. Ideally I didn’t plan an age gap but it’s how the cookie crumbles sometimes.

My own siblings have gaps I’m 29 and the others are 26, 15, and 18!

Dh and I have one child it is just a fact of life