Half sibling vs full sibling

[Monstermunch80]

I have DC aged 2, and a DSC aged 6 who we spend most weekends with. We are considering trying for another baby.

Im an only child and although I had a wonderful childhood, as a teen I felt lonely, and as an adult I really miss having a larger family/family members closer to age and stage of life. I had always envisaged having more than one child myself.

So my question - is a half sibling the same as having a full sibling if they don’t live in the same home full time? Is it better or worse in some ways? As I have no brothers or sisters I’m finding this hard to gauge.

We have a good set up at the moment whereby DC have their own space/attention during the week and then a sibling to grown up with and play with at weekends. They get on well now, however I’m worried they end up not being close as they get older (DSC lives miles away).

Does anyone have experience or wisdom?

I grew up with half brothers and sisters (I'm the only one with the same two parents). We spent all our time together and grew up close (still are). I never thought of them as anything other than normal brothers and sisters. But I think the key is spending lots of time together.

I'm going to be fully honest.

The half sibling I lived with I'm very very close to. I don't think if her as a half sibling. She's my sister and my best friend.

The half sibling I didn't live with I don't have any contact at with now since my Dad died. It's not my half sisters fault at all and we have no hard feelings against each other. It's one hundred per cent on my step mum and my father because despite living a ten min drive away, contact was once a month if that and we'd be treat very differently, like a burden and things like my brother and I had to share a bag of crisps while half sibling and step brother got one each, or we'd be left with a baby sitter while dad, step mum, step brother and half sister went swimming. That's why I view and feel differently about her, because my Dad and step mum treat us so differently and didn't encourage a sibling relationship.

I’m very close to my half sister but we lived together full time so we grew up together.
If your child only spends weekends with their half sibling they’re not really going to have the same bond.

I have two boys age 10 and 13 from my ex-husband and a four-month old baby daughter with my fiancé (his first-and last child-we're 39 and 44!)

Boys have exactly 50/50 (court decided) shared care between ex and myself, so basically week on, week off. It's been that way (unfortunately) since they were just 3 and 6.

Obviously I can't say how close the boys are going to end up with their sister. There is a big age gap and they are only with her every other week. For example, when my eldest son goes off to uni at 18 as is the plan, she will only be 5.

However, there is no guarantee any siblings are going to be close ateotd. For example, my mum is 1/5 full siblings, all close in age, and she only really is in contact with one of them now.

Watching my boys with our baby girl makes my heart sing. My teenage son pretends he's too cool to like/love her, but watching him tonight holding her and interacting with her you can tell he's pretty taken

I think if they spend more time together, they will be close. I see with my husband and his half siblings, they are close because they grew up together. While me and my half sister, we are not because we never see each other, we just knew about her. I would give her more siblings if I were you.

I'm not close to any of my half siblings (3), we never lived together and I saw them maybe once a year for about an hour as our mutual parent didn't make the effort. I know nothing about them or their lives, it's sad because they are now the only family I've got but they are strangers.

Have one more baby! Four is a great number

Thank you everyone for replying and sharing tour experiences! Much appreciated. So it does seem to depend on the dynamics and how much time the kids spend together really. We will hopefully be able to go family holidays all together but other than that contact will only be at the weekend.

It’s a good point that full siblings may not have a great bond either, but it’s probably more likely.

Covid has made things difficult to plan, money-wise so the main thing making us hesitant is the cost of moving or extending for extra space, and of course all the other costs of another DC! Lots to think about.

Thank you.