2 year old tantrums .. on my own!

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Hey everyone
I have a very inquisitive loving little boy however terrible 2s are in full swing..

Lockdown has been a nightmare- i am a key worker however due to lack of childcare i have had to stay off because my DS has a medical condition which makes him vulnerable. My partner has been working from morning til night (goes out at 8am comes back at 10,11 even 12 at night sometimes) however hes not earning all that much considering hes out of the house for that long but thats a whole other story so i wont get into that!

Cutting to the chase, im struggling so much with DS, we are in a flat with no garden space so we have spent lockdown in a cramped flat other than popping out for our daily exercise but going out is so hard! He will NOT get in his car seat, he screams and screams until he turns blue. Ive tried everything - telling him we don't go anywhere until he is in the car seat, giving him something to play with or eat while im trying to get him in, using an old car seat to put a dolly in there next to him nothing works!! I wont go out anymore unless partner is with us, it kills me!

Secondly, he is so ANGRY! The constant smacking and kicking me is getting me down, i cried myself to sleep every night for 2 weeks because i dont know how to handle it. He smacks for no reason, it comes out of nowhere! He has also started biting. I dont know what to do!

Also, he has started head butting EVERYTHING if he cant have something he wants right away, yesterday he head butted our laminate flooring, he has a huge bump on his head now because of how hard he hit it! Ive tried so hard to get him to stop this - no luck. At. All.

Screaming. Oh the screaming. Its horrible. He has stopped talking and just shouts instead.
I genuinely dont know where he gets it from! I would understand if i was constantly shouting but i hardly ever shout! I try my best to stay calm all of the time.

Finally..
Sleeping. He will NOT sleep. Nighttime or day time. Some nights hes not going to sleep until 1AM AFTER NO SLEEP AT ALL !! If he has a nap in the day, he gets to sleep around 10pm but then awake at 4 and ready for the day😫

I am EXHAUSTED. I love him so much but he is driving me crazy! I dont know what to do!

Any advice?

I'm sorry I haven't got any advice, I'm on my own with my 18 month old gs have been on our own throughout lockdown I was beginning to think I'm doing something terribly wrong because you've just described him!

He gets up okay but the second I put him down he's kicking things (including me) throwing things (at me) and generally just trying to destroy the place

As I'm clearing up one disaster he's creating the next it's a constant battle and I'm exhausted

Hopefully someone will be along to help us both soon, otherwise I'll start making them straight jackets!!

PS also battling sleep, been up since 3am which isn't helping either of us

First of all, you're doing an amazing job as a mummy ❤️ just because he's having a tough time at the moment doesn't make that any less of a fact.

DS is the same age and is full swing terrible twos as well so you have my complete sympathy! They're frustrated because they want to do everything independently but lack the skills required.

Give him choices, he either goes in the carseat now and you have a treat when you arrive at your destination or you play for 10 more minutes then he goes in the carseat. It might not work straight away but if you limit his options but still give him the opportunity to choose he's still getting to be independent.

Re the kicking, hitting and biting. With my son after he is physical I tell him no, we're gentle and then stroke his arm to show him. He now gives me a cuddle or strokes my arm whenever I ask him to be gentle. Again this might not work straight away but you've got to condition them to use the behaviour you want to see.

Sleeping I have no advice for. Some nights DS goes down without a peep and some nights he won't settle for hours and then wakes up multiple times during the night. This happens even when his routine is absolutely identical 🤷‍♀️ what I do know is he sleeps a lot better when I'm in the same room as him. Last night his mattress ended up on the floor in my room at 1am!

It's easy to say this this and this will work. Just because it does for me doesn't necessarily mean it will for you but something will work! If you don't see any improvement in his behaviour then change tactics. It's exhausting but you'll get through it

Oh and the screaming is an absolute kicker in my house too 😬😬 if you find a cure for that one please let me know!

My 2yo currently shrieks like a banshee at any given moment. It's soul destroying. I keep telling myself it will pass but it is really difficult.

I will say with regards to biting, not alot of people agree but I would say bite them back, they never do it again.

And one plus; you're on your own but you do have a partner 👍🏼