DD told me today she is lonely and missing all her friends :-(

[Littlebopeep123]

Tonight my 10 year old DD cried herself to sleep because she said she is lonely.
I'm at home trying to WFH a few hours each day around helping with any school work. She talks to friends on her phone etc and is still doing gymnastics online three times a week (not as long as when she was in the gym 12 hours) and a zoom ballet lesson per week. She's been emotional the last few days but hadn't said why until tonight. She said she doesn't know when she will see her friends (school and gym) again and it feels like absolutely ages since she saw them and wants to be able to play out. Even though she talks to some friends on the phone/video calls she says its not the same as talking face to face or playing in the street/park.
Prior to lockdown she was very routine driven and came home from school, did any homework and had tea all before 530 to be in the gym until 830 three nights a week. Friday she would go to her friends for tea and the following week her friend would come here. So always on the go with someone to chat to.
I don't know what to do to get her through these next few weeks. Most of her friends have a sibling (actually I think all do) so if we were to meet in the park their would be me and DD + 3 others. Do I just contact her close friends parents and see if any are happy to do this? What other things can we do (dad is at work 8-6 each day) to help? Thanks

Why don't you arrange a time for her to see one of her friends at a park? As long as they agree to stay apart. One parent supervising from a distance. The whole other family doesn't have to go - a parent could drop their child near the park gate and you take it from there.

That sounds a very good idea. I kept thinking whole family but at 9/10 I suppose parents could drop them then come back in x time to collect them and I could sit a bit further a way but near enough to remind them of distances if needed. Thank you.

We are going meet one of DD's friend in the park next week and them two walk round or sit on the grass and I'm going to sit further away. Being in Y5 DD wasn't in one of the years due back to school from 1st June but have today had an email from school saying they wont be opening on the 1st it will be the 15th and likely to just be Y6 to begin with so this make me thinks other years won't actually get back this school year. So hopefully a couple of park visits with her friend but what else can I do to stop her feeling lonely.

Will any friends do work together on a daily basis via facetime or zoom, an hour doing something together is really helping a lot of dc.

Also any online games they can play together (Mario Cart app for my lot)

When I go to the park I see parents who have clearly arranged to meet with others

Think about it

You and your DD can sit 2 meters away from a family group of 5.

What’s wrong if you sit 2m away from a friend?

If you’re worried about the police, I understand that.

I would arrange something like this every day you possibly can.

And write to No 10 - review date is Thursday 28th.

I should add - I really feel for her. This lockdown has completely ignored everyone’s mental health.

No advice OP just lots of sympathy. 8YO DS has really started to struggle in the last ten days. Hes missing school, cricket, cubs and his friends and family. He's really lonely and has said he doesnt enjoy life any more I honestly don't know what to do and how to help him. I'm furloughed so I'm schooling with him but I'm no substitute for his normal life.

My 10yo DD has been exactly the same. There have been tears and a general melancholy on several occasions. We're not allowed to sit in the park where we are just yet, so have resorted to 'happening to be in the front garden' when we know her friend will be heading out for a walk. It's done her the world of good.

Will suggest the online games but she's not really a games girl. I suppose I could suggest she videos one of the gym girls and they practice together, that might help the loneliness.

LilacTree1, I would love to go to the park and sit with others 2m but thought it was only 1 other we could meet?
EnglishGirlApproximately hugs to your 8 year old, it's hard for them isn't it especially if they are active like ours. DD misses her grandparents aswell. I think it's the not knowing when she can do things again that's making her emotional. She is very routine driven and is use to looking forward to gym comps and preparing for them.
DoorbellsSleighbellsSchnitzel hugs to your DD, fingers crossed you can go to the park soon. I actually did consider if we should accidentally pass some of her friends houses when going for a walk.
Hugs all

OP legally yes, it is only 1

Obviously I’m not encouraging you to fall foul of the police

I’m just saying that I can see people are meeting that way.

I agree with them. If you can sit 2m away from a family in the park, why it shouldn’t be one that you know?

I live alone so it’s moot. But I’m pleased when I see people meeting in the park. The lockdown won’t be lifted by government as long as they think people want it.

I think I agree with you. I don't really see a difference with only meeting 1 person surely 1 family would be more beneficial mental health wise because then mums get to see people aswell (most of her friends mums are currently WFH too)

Littlebopeep thank you, hugs to your DD too. I've been really supportive of lockdown even though its decimated the industry I work in, but this no mans land of some things opening but still no contact with friends and family is giving us the worst of all worlds. I wouldn't blame you at all if you had a socially distanced walk with friends.

EnglishGirlApproximately sorry to hear about your work.

Some of the girls in DSs class have 'socially distanced met up'. It is so hard for only children. DS has his brothers but the other day he said he felt 'captive' and 'claustrophobic' so we decided to drive somewhere for our exercise. He said the fresh air really helped and certainly helped the who families mood.

As long as you maintain social distancing you will be fine I am sure.

I really feel for only children at the moment, it must be so hard not being able to see their friends. I've got 3DC and lockdown has been good for their relationships but the elder two always energised when they talk to their friends and the youngest is really struggling not seeing his friends and he doesn't like zoom.