As a single parent, how do you maintain healthy friendships and relationships

[PorschanotPorsche]

I'm a single mother to be boy of almost 10. His dad not involved nor his family and I never have any spare time unless my family does on the off chance. I've lost friends, relationships and although I'm used to being alone sometimes it does suck.
Sometimes I wish I had every other weekend free like most other mums I know.
And it really infuriates me when people who claim to know me ask me to make time when It's not something I can do at the drop of a hat?

Is there anyone who is in the same boat or had similar experiences?

Meant I'm a single mother to a boy of almost 10, not sure why I typed the word 'be'

In my case, I joined local church and was helped by some kind ladies.

Air Cadets. They meet twice a week for 2.5 hours and had plenty of week/end away activities. It was at that time that I finally could have a consistent social life.

I also was lucky to be with a guy at that time who could always put himself second to DS, we had a lot of family oriented activities. Mind you, we didn’t have many nights out at all but to make time on our own, once DS was in secondary school, we used to meet for breakfast/coffee/walks while DS was having a lie in.

Local babysitter? My friends use a local (neighbour) teenager for £5ph.
I have a live in lodger and she looks after ds for me a few evenings a week so I can socialise/have hobbies.
Some weekends I travel to my family and hang out with them, my DS plays with his nieces and nephews and I get adult chat.
At the age your son is you only have a few more years until he is much more independent, hang in there!

It’s a struggle OP. Im in the same situation (except 2 DC). I have one close friend who is also a single parent but other than that my life is very lonely. Between working and DC/house/cooking/laundry etc in far too exhausted most evenings to have energy to go anywhere. DCs do go to scouts though which means a camp every now and again. They’re in different sections though so their camp weekends are never the same weekend

Yes, that's tough. My husband is abroad about 2 weeks a month and I have an only. He is 15 now. It's tough. We did things with other mums, and I would also end up typically outstaying my welcome when dropping my son off for play dates. And come up with strategies to 'keep' other mums staying for a cup of tea when they drop off. Going out in the evening wasn't an option until we had an after school babysitter one year. But that obviously comes at a cost. Also I work from home, so can pretty much set my own work times, so joined sports clubs with day time schedules. I did try organising 'evenings in' with friends but typically no one showed up as people do have busy lives. But perhaps you have friends who don't mind coming over to you to watch a movie? Other parents of only's are great!

Yes like op said, find him weekend and evening activities: scouts is good. Grand parents for babysitting? And also, once he is 13 he CAN be on his own 1 evening a week. Very healthy to learn how to look after himself. And perhaps also eg Saturday morning when you go for a coffee or similar. Now that he is 15 he loves!! it when I am away for half a day in the weekend. But obviously that is further away.

I think this is common OP. It’s just how it does sometimes. I only have one child free weekend a month and tbh my 2 best friends don’t have children. We are close but obviously their life’s are different. So even when I am free I don’t necessarily do anything spectacular either. I rarely go on nights out.