Hi. Just wanted to talk really.
I split with my ex at the start of the year (just over a month ago). It was a huge shock to him but not many other people that knew me (and they were surprised how much it shocked him). We hadn't been in a good place for a while.
Once we split I've allowed my ex to stay in the house (my house) in the spare room until he can get finances sorted. Deadline for him to be out is end of Feb as I don't want it dragging on.
However this has created a strange situation for DS (2yrs old) whereby she doesn't know what's going on and doesn't understand. She used to sleep through the night in her own cot but for the past month she's been in with me after waking up at about 11 and not settling any other way (no complaints -i love having her with me).
My issue is this - on the odd occasion I just can't settle her, and as soon as daddy appears she goes to him and immediately settles in his bed. This upsets me (understandably) as last night for example I tried to settle her for an hour before he showed up and then she settled in two minutes for him.
Once he moves out I'm scared that on some nights she won't settle at all, and I work full time to pay bills etc...
I'm sad for her at the break up of the family, sad for me as I always wanted more than one and that's unlikely now (I'm 38), worried that she will prefer daddy (recognised as irrational but can't help it), and wondering how long it might take for her to be settled again once he moves out.
I think most of her unsettled behaviour comes from picking up on his depressed mood and the uncertainty - is this likely? In which case she might get better once he's out of the house?