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Original poster

Random/boring question re dining room chairs

13 replies

FishenNuggets · 01/10/2015 23:32

We are a family of 3 (me, DH and DS). It's highly likely that this is how were going to stay (we are officially done with IVF and TTC).

We are doing up our house, and going to be looking at dining room tables and chairs next year. DH wants 6 seats to be there all the time. I'm worried they'll be a reminder of emptiness and of what we haven't been able to manage and would be more tempted by 4 being out there all the time, and hiding two (fold-up types) away.

At the moment, our table is in an odd place, and we can only really fit 3 chairs around it one a day to day basis. Every time someone comes round, we have to go to the garage and get the extra chairs out. And we do have people round fairly frequently but not all the time.

My question is for those with 3 people-families, how many dining room seats do you have?

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marriednotdead · 01/10/2015 23:47

I used to have a 6 seater when it was just the three of us, and we'd sit round one end. Then DH and his entourage arrived and the next table was a 6-8 with two fold up chairs in the cupboard. Luckily the dining room was big enough but I hated the bulk of it all tbh.

Back to just me and DS, and more than happy with a 4 seater table and the fold up chairs are still in the cupboard. I've only actually got 3 dining chairs now plus a high seater for DGS who is here 1 day a week.

I guess it depends how often you have extras over and how much space you want to take up...

Original poster
FishenNuggets · 01/10/2015 23:58

How often we have people round could change couldn't it? DS (4yrs) will start to have friends round for tea etc more but then maybe DH and I would eat later...

Hmmm... Tricky...

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ThighsofThunder · 02/10/2015 00:30

If it helps (we have three but I saw this on active and came for a nosey) if our kids have friends round we always eat later. We usually set pick up time for about six so dinner before that is too early for us. And not enough chairs means you don't need to have loads of friends at a time!

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FishenNuggets · 02/10/2015 23:31

I quite like the odd bit of craziness. Maybe partly because as a family of 3, life can never be as full on as a larger family.

DS does try his best though. Smile

Maybe 6 then is the answer...

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AnnaMarlowe · 02/10/2015 23:33

We are a family of 4. We have 8 seats at our table.

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FishenNuggets · 03/10/2015 00:15

Did you want more children? Do you find the empty seats a reminder of the child/ren you couldn't have?

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AnnaMarlowe · 03/10/2015 02:54

Fish we cannot have any more children. We struggled for a long time to have our children so are just very grateful for what we have.

I don't view it in that light though, I have extra table places to enable us to welcome both sets of GPs or another family to share a meal with us regularly. I often invite a pile of children round and they all share a meal together.

A large table to me represents welcoming friends and family into our home.

If it's a source of distress to you then have less places and pop the extra chairs in a cupboard/the garage etc until they are needed for guests.

Please don't see your little family as 'less' though. I fully understand how hard it is to go though infertility but all the families of three I know are fab. They can do all sorts of things together that are much harder for larger families and have more energy/time/money to focus on their only one. My best friend is an only child, is extremely close to their parents and has always said that it was wonderful being an 'enfant unique'.

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FishenNuggets · 03/10/2015 09:06

Thank you.

I feel both ways about it at the moment! Maybe it's too soon to make that decision. Our last IVF cycle only failed last week. Such an unexpected random thing to be stuck on!

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AnnaMarlowe · 03/10/2015 09:42

Fish only a week since your last IVF cycle? Flowersand an unMumsnetty hug.

Don't think about chairs just now. If you have to order them right now, get the larger number and put them out of sight.

If you don't have to buy them now, leave it a while until you feel a bit better about it.

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FishenNuggets · 04/10/2015 08:33

Aw thank you. No we don't have to order them now but I do like to plan ahead and am probably using the house as a distraction from the IVF. Time to move on but maybe not quite time to forget...

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AnnaMarlowe · 04/10/2015 09:06

It's not been very long Fish, I think you sound very sensible and practical, it's just that sometimes our hearts take a wee while to catch up with our heads!

OutToGetYou · 04/10/2015 09:14

We have just me, dp and dss. I never had children.
We have foyr chairs and a two seat bench. Extra chairs in garage.
We love having impromptu meals, friends round etc, so having the chairs there means we can just do that.
We also like to have friends round for board games.
I wanted six chairs and the bench but dp vetoed on the grounds it would look too busy.
I regret not buying the extra chairs really. The spares in the garage don't match.

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FishenNuggets · 07/10/2015 19:24

Our garage spares don't match each other and certainly won't match the new ones. We'll still keep the garage spares as they all fold. I think we'll put our old table and chairs in the extension, and try it with the chairs to see if it gets too cluttered.

DS (4y) loves whizzing around the empty space with his toys at the moment. Maybe 6 chairs would be a shock to the system for all of us!
Thank you x

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