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Nurseries

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Original poster

Parental Responsibility Form

45 replies

soph24 · 07/04/2010 21:57

My sons nursery has given me a form relating to parental responsibility and asked for a copy of his birth certificate. I find this intrustive have they a right to ask?

I realise I am only sensitive about the subject because of my own circumstances. My husband is the only father my son has know - we have been together since he was 3 months old but he is not his biological father.

But I really do not think this is any of the nursery's business.

thanks
soph

OP posts:

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Missus84 · 07/04/2010 22:00

The nursery will just need to know who is allowed to collect your child, and if there are family members the child mustn't have contact with.

CarGirl · 07/04/2010 22:01

If you are wanting to claim the EYFS funding then yes they need to see the birth certificate. You can get a version of the BC that doesn't state the parents of the child just the childs name and date of birth, think it's called the summary version. Perhaps you should buy one of those?

thisisyesterday · 07/04/2010 22:03

cargirl, isn't that the short one that you get anyway? and you have to pay for the longer version?

so op might already have that. but agree, they will need to see it

CarGirl · 07/04/2010 22:05

I can't remember, have got loads of the things (too many children!)

Lifeinagoldfishbowl · 07/04/2010 22:05

I remember our nursery doing the same thing a while back - agree - I don't really see it's any of their bussiness

Missus84 · 07/04/2010 22:05

The nursery don't really care if your husband is your son's biological father though - you can just put his name down as one of the people who can collect your son.

thisisyesterday · 07/04/2010 22:12

me too, i was going to check but i have no idea where they are

cat64 · 07/04/2010 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:20

I would have just put my husbands name on the form but they want a copy of the birth cert - which has his biological fathers name on. Not the name of the man that pays the fees and changes the nappies!!
I dont think the short version of the birth certificate will wash as it clearly says they want to know who has parrental responsibility.

My son has my husbands surname we changed it by deed poll with the permission of his biological father. But his biological father wont agree to adoption.

I realise that it will not bother the nursery staff - but i feel it is disrespectful to my husband.

OP posts:

thisisyesterday · 07/04/2010 22:23

it isn't disrespectful. they can't be disrespectful if they have NO idea can they? they're asking becasue it's protocol, and if you refuse then there's not much they can do I suspect.

but I think you need to calm down a bit and maybe just talk to the manager and explain the situation instead

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:29

oh i dont think they as in the staff are being disrespectful i just mean the situation.

OP posts:

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:31

So is the opinion that I have to fill in the form and produce the certificate?

When they gave me the form a few weeks ago I just ignored it and hoped they would not ask again.

We pay for the nursery we are not claiming any grants or anything.

OP posts:

Missus84 · 07/04/2010 22:31

It seems quite reasonable that a nursery would want to know who has parental responsibility for a child in their care. You can give your husband permission to collect etc.

CarGirl · 07/04/2010 22:34

parental responsibility has legal implications so yes they do need to know. If you ex has parental responsibility then by law he can collect his child from the nursery and they cannot refuse him I'm afraid.

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:39

No he wouldn't need or try to collect him anything - i am not concerned about anything like that. Its just i feel my husband has brought him up and pays the fees shold be the one with parental responsibility as far as the nusery is concerned.

OP posts:

CarGirl · 07/04/2010 22:42

Unfortunately the nursery have to be careful and know absolutely who has legal parental responsibility, just as schools do.

It won't be an issue your husband can act as locis parentis as when required and presumably your ex won't every exercise his parental responsibilities rights.

Missus84 · 07/04/2010 22:45

The nursery have to act within the law though.

There's no problem with you telling the nursery your husband has responsibility for anything concerned with your son and his care though.

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:46

I am actually a teacher - at a secondary school - and we do not ask to see birth certificates. The parent just fills in a form.

OP posts:

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:50

The form actually implies that he cannot make decision about care if he does not have parental responsibilty. He could still pick him up.

OP posts:

Missus84 · 07/04/2010 22:53

Do you need your husband to do anything but collect though? I can't think of many situations where he would need to make a care decision that you could not be consulted about.

Original poster

soph24 · 07/04/2010 22:59

Yes that is a good point - probably being oversenstive.

OP posts:

nurseryvoice · 08/04/2010 16:06

I dont think its over sensitive. I own and manage a nursery and also understand where you are coming from .....
Just say you are not providing it because it is private. end of..

saggarmakersbottomknocker · 08/04/2010 16:23

Secondary schools don't ask for birth certificates becuase they will have already been seenearlier on in the child's school history. orimary ask for birth certificates and who has parental responsbility. An absent parent who has parental repsonsibility within the law can ask to have copies of school reports etc.

saggarmakersbottomknocker · 08/04/2010 16:24

Please excuse my totally crap typing!

PandaG · 08/04/2010 16:32

working in a preschool we do legally have to ask for birth certificate (or passport actually I think - needs to be proof of id and DOB for funding)- part of the reasoning is we do need to know who has parental responsibility.

Sorry if that seems intrusive - I understand why in your circumstances you would feel that, but legally we cannot refuse someone with parentla responsibility to pick up the child (unless court order in place)

Am sure that if your DH picks your son up, and a q involving parental responsibility needs to be answered a quick phone call to you would be all that was needed.

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