Toddler in nursery whilst on ML with newborn?

[choceyes]

Hi,

Not sure if this is the right place to post this...

I'm currently pregnant with No2 and due in August. DS will be 21 months when No 2 is here.

Currently DS1 goes to nursery 4 days a week (8.30-4pm.)

I'm thinking of reducing his days at nursery to 2 or 3 when I start on ML...so the question is should I go for 3 days or 2. I've been mulling over this for ages now and can't decide.
An issue is that as the nursery doesn't open till 8.30 (as it's an onsite nursery at my workplace), my DH can't do the drop offs as he's a teacher and needs to be in work by 8.30. He can however pick him up at 5.30pm.

How realistic is it that I could do the drop off during the early weeks of having to deal with a newborn? Dropping off means walking 30mins into city centre and then another 30mins back home again. I really don't relish doing this especially when the whether is crap and i'm so tired looking after a newborn. Also I'm likely to have an elective c-section.

I'm thinking doing 2 days is easier than 3 due to the drop off issue, but having DS in nursery for 2 days enough to get enough of a break with the newborn?
I had serious issues with breastfeeding DS, not latching on (had to express for 11 months in the end) and I'm determined to succeed this time, but I'm worried how I can deal with that with a toddler in tow on my own 3 days a week. My family live 300miles away and prob will visit us every fortnight or so.

Also I'm worried that 2 days a week at nursery is not enough stimulation for DS. I'm sure I will take him to playgroups and whatnot, so it prob will be OK I guess.

Sorry about the long essay. Will be grateful if anybody has any advice!

My ds1 was exactly 2 when ds2 was born and went to nursery 2 days/week. Trouble was that the nursery was my work nursery, too, a 40-45-min trip door-to-door using a busy commuter train. We kept him there the 2 days, though he didn't go for the first couple of weeks. You wouldn't have to take your ds1 while you were still recovering from your c-section. Is there anyone else who might be able to do the odd drop-off for you? Your dh won't be working in August, will he? Could you treat yourself to the odd taxi?

After that, I did 3 out of the 4 trips and, I must say, it was hard work. However, it did mean I had some time on my own with the new-born, which was wonderful. And it would have been hugely unfair on ds1 to take him out of nursery, even if we would have saved a lot of money by doing it.

So not quite the same situation as yours. I'd advise maybe dropping to 2 days, but it may depend how hard it is to get more days after your ML is over as you may not want to lose the place. Bear in mind that your toddler won't necessarily need to be there on the dot of 8.30am, will he? And would it give you opportunities to meet work friends for breakfast/coffee sometimes? I used to do this so it wasn't just a rush into town and back again. Or maybe there's a local cinema with a parent/baby film screening each week that you could go to later in the morning?

It's good to be thinking it through but try not to let the decision overshadow the rest of your pregnancy or your time with ds on his own. Best of luck.

My little boy (3.5 years) goes to nursery 4 days a week and I will be keeping himin for 3 days when I go on Maternity leave in May. I will probably shorten his days though and take him in a bit later (he usually starts at 8 due to my work hours) and pick him up abit earlier (usually stays till 530).

DS arrived in August, DD was 3 .3 , started 5 x 2.5 hour sessions at antepre school a mix of morning and afternoon. I have kept 3 1/2 days with my CM, so on a Tues, Wed , Thurs I have some time on my own with DS . This has worked well for us . Its hard work getting the 3 of us up washed fed dressed and out the door for 8.30 but its getting easier! My CM has been great . Now I will start putting DS to CM for a half day to get him used to her for when I go back to work and I will take DD swimming or something just the 2 of us.

Ds continued at nursery 3 days a week whilst I was on mat leave which was great for giving me time with dd and also for ds to have some normality.
I was lucky though as dh used to take/collect him esp in the early weeks as I couldn't drive due to csection.

I think it is a good idea to keep your DS in nursery but difficult due to the long walk involved - particularly if you do have an elective c-section. However, if your DH is a teacher, won't he be on holiday when the baby is due in August (bearing in mind elective cs are usually done at about 39 weeks) therefore be able to do the drop-offs for the first few weeks?

I kept DS1 in nursery for his usual 4 days a week throughout my maternity leave with DS2 and, even though I still go a bit at the money we spent, it was the best decision as DS1 is very full-on and it really gave me a break and some lovely time with DS2. My nursery is only a 10-minute walk away so I was doing 2 x 20 minute walks a day after about 3 weeks following an elective c-section.

I would go with it and if some days you really don't feel upto the walk, don't take your DS in - but tbh, I loved the morning walks as it got me up and out whereas I was likely to slob in pj's for the entire day and I actually really miss doing it now I am back at work.

Thanks for the replies!

Yes DH will be able to take him to nursery for the first few weeks, so I'll be OK for those early weeks. Even wihtout the c-section, it's the thought of having to go out with a newborn 3 days a week when all you want to do is sleep and slob around! But I remember from the first time, after about 6 weeks I was out and about anyway almost everyday, so I guess I'd be OK.

I'm verging towards keeping him in for 3 days now. Will take him in later so we all have time to get ready in the morning. I think it'll be worth it to spend some extra time with the new baby and catch up on some sleep later on in the day!