Child #2 nursery or childminder?

[emmajlh]

DD1 has been in nursery 2 days per week since she was 10 months old. She also goes to her grandparents 1 day per week. She is now 3 years old and baby #2 is due in April.

Reflecting on DD1s time in nursery over the past 2 and a bit years I?m having trouble deciding what to do with #2 when I return to work in 2011 ? nursery or childminder.

When DD1 was in ?the baby room? at nursery she would often cry when I left but I was always assured that she was fine as soon as I was out of sight. When she moved into the next room at around 12 months it was all fairly smooth sailing (no tears when I dropped her off), the next room was at around 18 months and was also fairly positive although there were some phases of tears they were all fairly short lived.

The room she is in now she has been in since she was about 2.5 years old. This is a much bigger room with a lot more children in and although she has been fine for the past couple of months the first 3 months were proper big tears and having to be peeled off me and lots of ?I don?t want to go to nursery?.

Throughout the 2 and a bit years of also going to her grandparents there has never been any tears. I know this is probably because they spoil her and she gets their undivided attention.

Whenever she has been crying when I drop her off I tell myself she?ll be fine in a few minutes and perhaps she?ll be more independent as she grows up (?!!). She is a wonderful child; happy, assertive, sociable, good at sharing etc and I think; is part of that because of nursery or would she be exactly the same had she been with a childminder?

Has anyone got any views? How do you ever know what is best? I don?t regret the childcare solutions I choose for DD1 I think she has learnt a lot of skills from nursery (not to say she wouldn?t have learnt the same skills with a childminder) and has always been happy when I?ve picked her up and has friends there and staff she adores. Thinking of #2 I wonder if there wouldn?t be the tears with a childminder. I know I could always go with one choice and then change but changes can be really unsettling for babies/toddlers so would prefer to make the right choice from the start.

Anyone had any similar experiences and made a different childcare choice for #2?

Also posted in childminders.

I considered putting dd2 with a cm instead of the nursery dd1 had always gone to because I thought she might get more 1:1 care and not get as sick as dd1 had when she started nursery. However, in the end I didn't do it because I felt like I knew what the nursery was like, I had always been happy with the way they cared for dd1 and if I used a cm (even though I would have done as many checks as I could), I would be venturing into the unknown. The only problem was it worked out extortionately expensive to fund nursery care for 2 children. It would have been cheaper to use a cm. I think its a judgement call - your dc2 might be a totally different character to dd1 (mine was! There was never a single tear when I took her to nursery unlike dd1)