Baby seems unhappy at nursery - what to do?

[Katy767]

My 9-month-old started nursery last week - she's going 4 days a week, 8 till 6. Every morning she screams and clings to me, and I'm very concerned that this nursery/situation is not right for her.

I've read some research that nurseries are not good for children under 18 months. Now in a real tizzy as to whether I should move her to a smaller nursery (she's in a large baby group and they also mix with the toddlers), or try to find a nanny or childminder.

Would appreciate any advice at all as finding it all extremely upsetting and stressful and am back at work in a few days.

I think that from her age to about a year is the most clingy age, and that it would be difficult wherever you send her, so I would stick with it. Try to remain cheerful and matter-of-fact when dropping her off which may help her feel more secure. Try to support the nursery staff as their job will not be easy at the moment. Good luck, I'm sure it will improve and you'll be glad in the long run when you've got a sociable and confident little girl.

I agree with the OP (I prefer as close as one-to-one care over nurseries under 18months) and I would try to find a childminder.

Hi there, thanks a lot for your replies. I'm thinking one-to-one is probably better for babies under a year or 18 months, especially as now is the most clingy stage but I'm stuck with the situation at the moment. Will see how she gets on over the next month or so and if it's still not working, I'll have to look at a childminder or nanny option. But in the long run, I think you're right that nurseries help children to be sociable and confident. Thanks, K

How is she the rest of the day though? Does she seem upset when you arrive to pick her up?

My dd is now 12 months and has been going for 4 months to a nursery (baby room so max 6 babies). She often cries when i drop her off but I stand outside the door and can hear her stop within 30s. I guess it's her way of saying she doesn't want me to go, but I can't imagine that would be any different with a childminder.
However, she is always happily playing when I turn up to pick her up, have never caught her looking upset and I think you could tell if they had been upset all day!

What do staff say your dd is like during the day?

Also, I think most babies need at least a couple of weeks to get used to the room / new environment, so I wouldn't do anything too hasty like moving her somewhere else straight away as that would be v unsettling.