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Nurseries

Find nursery advice from other Mumsnetters on our Nursery forum. For more guidance on early years development, sign up for Mumsnet Ages & Stages emails.

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Original poster

Is it normal for nurseries to expect children under 1 to only have 1 nap a day?

35 replies

BlameItOnTheBogey · 10/03/2009 15:50

Really confused at the moment. DS is meant to be starting nursery soon. Just found out that all the babies are put down for a nap at the same time after lunch. Nothing in the morning. Just don't know how he will last that long - at the moment he has two good long naps a day of about 90 mins each one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Is this really normal and can little ones survive on so little daytime sleep?

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MrsMattie · 10/03/2009 15:52

It;s normal for nurseries to have some sort of one-size-fits-all policy, yes. It might differ from nursery to nursery. My son's nursery put them down for naps twice a day and that didn't fit with my DS, who refused to sleep in the afternoon...

You might have to adjust your routine once he starts nursery. But if he is really struggling terribly after the first few weeks, you should certainly raise it with the nursery.

wasabipeanut · 10/03/2009 15:52

I don't think this is normal 0 my ds's nursery put them all down at the same time but only when they go up to the next class which happens at about 14-15 months.

In the Baby room they all nap as and when they want to - no fixed times.

I wouldn't have sent him somewhere that his nap times were dicatated by anyone else.

Original poster

BlameItOnTheBogey · 10/03/2009 15:54

Thanks for the replies. I'm really conflicted now. I thought I was ok with this but maybe I'm not. We just went for the morning yesterday and he was a wreck all afternoon as he couldn't cope with such a long awake stretch. Am feeling really upset by the whole thing but wonder if I am just being PFB about it.

OP posts:

wasabipeanut · 10/03/2009 15:56

It's a difficult time for both of you.

How old is he?

MrsMattie · 10/03/2009 15:57

I don't think you are being PFB. It is a big adjustment for both of you. If he was wrecked and you are feeling really worried, talk to them about it. There has to be some flexibility with babies. Wouldn't they rather he had an extra sleep than be fractious and unhappy all day?

Original poster

BlameItOnTheBogey · 10/03/2009 16:11

He's 10 months old. I'll see how it goes for the rest of the week. Just wonder if my expectations are way too high. Everyone I know raves about this nursery. Thanks for replying.

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Bettymum · 10/03/2009 16:48

At my DDs nursery the little ones (20 months and younger) sleep when they are tired. The full-time ones have their own little cots in a separate room and the part-timers sleep in the main room, but get patted and shushed and seem to sleep fine. DD's nap times are never the same two days in a row. I would be surprised to have all babies of that age asleep at the same time, maybe when they're older but not at 10 months (DD is 13 months).
But then babies are adaptable little things, maybe he'll get used to it??

lynniep · 10/03/2009 17:03

Whilst I dont think its normal for nurseries to expect children under 1 to only have 1 nap a day, I think its normal for nurseries to have a standard naptime as a previous poster said.

However, I also think its normal to allow children to sleep when they need to, and have facilities for that. (I appreciate not all nurseries are able to do this - but mine is pretty small and manages) Parents should be allowed to state when they want their children to nap, and nursery staff should work with them as far as possible.

At ours, the baby room allows for napping at any time the child needs it. They are wonderful and will cuddle/stroke/bounce/swing the baby to sleep if there is a spare pair of arms.

In toddlers they will do the same, and although they try to keep them to the set naptime, there are mats and cushions and a dark corner available if child is - um - cream crackered! They will also put them in a buggy and rock them if they are resisting sleep but clearly need it and can't get them to sleep any other way. (They draw the line at taking them out in the car!!)

I dont think your expections are too high. I think nurseries should try to accomodate parents and children - thats what theyre there to do. And whilst its hard for them to have children sleeping willy nilly - if a child needs to sleep they should help them do that.

purepurple · 10/03/2009 19:13

In our baby unit babies can sleep when they want, you should have a meeting with his key person where you will be able to discuss any worries or concerns you have. If you want your baby to have 2 sleeps then tell them that.

Original poster

BlameItOnTheBogey · 10/03/2009 19:46

Thanks for all these replies. He's not being assigned a key person until his first day (ie not during settling in). It all just seems a bit wrong at the moment. I wonder if I just had an unrealistic view of what it would be like. I'm really upset about it all at the moment.

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rubyslippers · 10/03/2009 19:47

you need to meet his keyworker BEFORE you leave him there

my DS went to nursery from 6months and he slept when HE needed to

i don't think it is an unrealistic expectation for a child under one to have more than one nap per day

are you happy with the nursery generally?

Hulababy · 10/03/2009 19:51

Both of DD's nurseries has a group nap/rest time after lunch, until in the over 2s room. But this was not enforced and non napping children could do some quiet activity with a member of staff such as looking at books, etc.

But they were also allowed to nap at other times if they wished too. Both nurseres had a small quiet room with cots for babies.

Original poster

BlameItOnTheBogey · 10/03/2009 20:06

I thought I was really happy with it. As I said, it had great reviews. I know a number of people who use it and are full of praise. But there were a number of things that worried me yesterday and now I am a mess. I'm seriously re-evaluating. But with less than 10 days to go, the chances of finding something else are pretty slim. It is normal to meet the keyworker and have a chat with them isn't it? I'm new to this....

OP posts:

rubyslippers · 10/03/2009 20:15

i am sorry to say but if you are worried now, then you need to listen to your gut instinct

get on the phone tomorrow and start ringing round other providers ...

it is absolutely usual to meet the keyworker and have settling in sessions with them - we had several with DS IIRC

poor you - what a pain but if you go back to work worried about your childcare and your DS you will be a mess

bodiddly · 10/03/2009 20:21

the nursery ds is at let the under 1s nap as and when they need it or according to the parents wishes. After the age of 1 if they are ready they encourage them to have one longer nap after an early lunch but if they still need more than one nap it isnt a problem. You are paying them to look after your child so it is up to you really if you think he needs 2 sleeps. I think most children of 10 months old still need 2 sleeps especially when they start nursery as it is really tiring for them!

CMOTDibbler · 10/03/2009 20:32

DS has been at 2 nurseries in the babyroom (we moved when he was 14 months). At both, they had a separate nap room, and the babies could sleep whenever they wanted - and they all had their own cot. At 18 months, he went up to toddlers where they nap after lunch on mats, but even then they were happy with his 2 hour nap.

I think its a bad sign if they expect babies to fit round their timetable tbh

What else worried you ?

Original poster

BlameItOnTheBogey · 10/03/2009 20:34

Hmm well there was an agency person there because they were short staffed and she didn't engage at all with the babies. One of them cried for such a long time when I was there and nobody really did anything. On the positive side, the permanent staff there were lovely and clearly good with kids. Maybe it was just a bad day.

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willowthewispa · 10/03/2009 21:02

It may have just been a bad day.

In my group (12-24 months) everyone has a sleep after lunch on a mat. However, we do share a cot room with the under 1s, and a couple of ours still sleep in cots and still have a morning nap too.

Did you tell them what time he normally sleeps in the morning? Maybe ask them to put him down for a nap in the morning at his usual time and see what their reaction is.

CMOTDibbler · 10/03/2009 21:17

Neither of the nurseries we have used use agency staff. At the old one (there from 4.5 to 14 months), they 3 or 4 staff who did bank for them, but always tried to use them in toddler or preschool rooms rather than babies. At his current nursery they have a number of part timers who do more hours when necessary, but again, they try to keep babies more consistent.

Did they say anything about the crying baby ?

spicemonster · 10/03/2009 21:23

In my DS's nursery (he's not there any more) napping was random in the baby room - as and when the babies needed it. There were always a couple of babies sleeping when I went. He had 2 naps a day of about an hour or so. We left when he was 15m and it was still the same system. As far as I know, they didn't do that 'one nap a day' thing until they were around 18 months.

My DS would never have coped on one nap at 10m - he's 2 and he still needs a good hour a day

Bubbaluv · 10/03/2009 21:50

My nursery asked me to provide DS's normal routine and they put himdown at his normal time (twice a day) until he was obviously not needing the second nap. They then discussed it with me and we agreed to move his nap to the middle of the day (about 16 mo at this point). Once he moved up into the older group (toddlers) they started to guide him towards the more standardized nursery routine (which was pretty much what he was doing then anyway) but they would still give him a nap at any time if he obviously needed it.
I think I may have the nicest nursery inthe world!

Scarfmaker · 10/03/2009 22:29

The only way you will get round this is to go down the childminder route - they will be more accommodating to your little one's sleep routine.

It must be mayhem trying to get so many babies and toddlers asleep in a confined space!

willowthewispa · 10/03/2009 22:35

No, it's not mayhem - and a good nursery will be able to accomodate a child's sleep routine.

purepurple · 11/03/2009 07:29

write down your baby's routine and ask them to stick to it if possible

you should know who your key person is before you start,maybe phone them and ask for another settling in session

it is quite noermal that you will feel like this

LittleMonkeysMummy · 11/03/2009 08:27

My DD's nursery put all the children down at around 12 after lunch. However, they ask for the cildren's routine so if the sleep more often they are put down. I have heard one parent commenting that they don't want their child to sleep for more than 20mins at nursery as they won't sleep at night (incidently this child ALWAYS looks shattered, cries constantly during the day and according to the mother never sleeps well at night)

I've told Nursery that if my DD seems tired or wants to sleep let her (often she'll have a long nap after lunch and occassionlly a short 20min one in the morning)

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