Toddler not eating at nursery - normal?

[bondgirl77]

Hi all, just posting for some advice. My 15-month-old DS has just started at nursery as we have just moved house. Previously he had been at a childminder from age 5 months, so is quite used to being left from 8-6.

We only had a settling in period of one afternoon, partly due to his place not being available until a week after we'd moved house, and because I'd already taken so much holiday we had to stick with this. His next visit was a full day (nearly, I was off sick so collected him early due to the not eating!)

He basically refuses to eat whilst there, even though he seems happy enough (after initial desperate crying and clinging to me when I drop him off). He drinks a bottle and managed one yoghurt last Friday, but won't eat the meals, even though it is cooked on site fresh and all the dishes are fairly similar to the ones I would give him at home. They feed him in a similar way to me, so that isn't different. And he sleeps there fine, so he's comfortable enough to do that. Today is his third full day and he still will not eat. I don't really want him to be given bottles instead because that is a step back, I would rather him get used to eating there as quickly as he can.

I've been lucky in that I've been able to collect him early all the days he has been there so far. The first day he hadn't drunk anything either, and on arrival home wolfed down two slices of toast and drunk the equivalent of a whole day's water in about 30 seconds! So he was obviously hungry and thirsty.

Anyone else experience this? Does it settle down? He seems happy enough, playing there and looking at his books and having cuddles with the staff. It just seems so unlike him as normally a very good eater, unless ill or teething.
Thanks!

don't have any advice but didn't want your post to go unanswered. I actually have the opposite problem - dd eats everything at nursery but not at home

I am sure it will settle down when he realises that he will go hungry if he just doesn't eat. I would be concerned at the drinks though - at 15 months he isn't really old enough to know he is thirsty so the staff should really be making sure he is drinking.

What does his keyworker/manager say about it?

Re: drinks - do you take in your own cup or beaker? This might help.

Re: eating - its not unusual at all for this to happen(i'm a nursery manager). In the past we have found that sometimes a small amount of finger food on highchair rather than meal in a bowl helps. Also for adult not to sit too near (sounds odd but in my experience children will sometimes eat when not being watched - obviously near enough for safety!)

Try not to worry about the food issue (easy to say as i've discovered since i've had my own DS!). It should settle down.

took boy over a week of full time before he would eat dinner at nursery- they will have seen it before. Now hes only one day a week hes doing it again and not drinking much either.
We now have asked nursery to give him a drink of milk at dinner time regardless of his eating and try him with a drink at other times of day. he likes milk and will drink it. They also give him extra afternoon snack ( sandwich or crackers and cheese) as he will eat that.

Hi everyone thanks for your comments. DS is on his 5th day today and still not eating anything! Guess I will just have to wait. At least he is only there every other day, Mon, Weds, Fri so on the days in between he eats well. Another problem is I think he is in with children that are all younger than him and gets upset when they have their afternoon bottles at 2. Maybe for the days he is there I should just let him have an afternoon bottle as well as a morning one, at least then I would know he's getting a bit in his tummy! Just so horrid knowing he is hungry there.

bondgirl- if you want him toi have a drink of milk but NOT a bottle- just ask teh nursery to give him a lidded cup ( or a non lidded if hes up to it) of milk when younger ones have bottle. A good nursery will be happy to do it. As you say- you would know he was having a drink and some goodness in him.

my DD didn't eat or drink initially at nursery took about 6 weeks to settle down I'm afraid but like your Ds she was only part time and ate loads on the other days. She has just moved up a room and again has stopped eating lunch but will eat tea (obvioulsy starving by then!)I'm hoping she'll sort herself out again soon

my dd was like tis for a couple of weeks when she started nursery, i used to have a snack in the car for when i picked her up, an apple, banana etc.
it passed to the extent i think she actualy eats better at nursery than at home now.

Thank you happy and dylsmum! Reassuring to know it does improve with time.

Hi bondgirl77 - all maybe resolved now. However, in my experience DD started nursery (5 days) at 12 months, now 18 months. In these six months DD took about 2 weeks to settle into eating the food there - she would come home and eat masses, but she got there in the end. Since then she has had a period of not eating lunch at nursery (would eat tea) which lasted six weeks. I was getting worried as she was feeling skinny around the ribs. I always suggest to friends who worry about something at nursery to really speak to the staff. I spoke to them about the eating and it just meant that they made an extra effort to help DD, and she got her appetite back. For a while she then would not eat at home! They seem to know what they want, and it is a great worry if it does not fit in with our expectations. For the afternoon, maybe the nursery would give your DS a little yogurt rather than a bottle of milk just so he is not going backwards??

My DD is on a roll at the moment where she is eating at home and at nursery - it feels great, but I am sure she will change this soon! Just keeping me on my toes! I hope you are OK, try not to worry - or maybe your DS is the best eater in the group now.