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is 1 day a week enough to settle?

12 replies

julietbat · 16/10/2008 10:56

My 7 month old dd has been going to a (very good) nursery for 1 day a week since the beginning of Sept. She's generally been fine there - eats and drinks ok, plays ok, although does cry when I drop her in the morning (although the staff tell me she stops pretty quickly after I've gone). But last week she had a horrible day and refused all food and drink and really just cried most of the time. She cut her first tooth that evening so we know what the problem was but this morning when I dropped her she cried so hard she couldn't breathe properly I don't know if it's just bad timing that she is teething (and has a little bit of a cold) so therefore is more clingy at the mo, or whether she's not settling as well or easily as she could do because she's only there one day a week. A couple of friends of mine with toddlers in nursery say that their observations suggest babies settle quicker if they go more regularly than once a week. What do you think? I don't really want to put her in more than once a week because she goes to grandparents (both sets) for one day each and then the other two days are my days with her - and none of us want to give up our time with her! But if it's going to make her more settled and happy at nursery I'd do it in a second...

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
bundle · 16/10/2008 10:59

agree easier to settle if do more than one day a week, pref consecutive days

witchandchips · 16/10/2008 11:00

some babies are fine with a day a week but mine wasn't. I moved to two half days (tuesdays and thursdays) and he settled much better.

bundle · 16/10/2008 11:03

(both my daughters went to nursery from around 7 months to when they went to school - 3 days a week in small, friendly community nursery)

julietbat · 16/10/2008 13:25

thanks for that - I'm thinking two mornings (8-12) might work better. I was planning maybe mon and thurs - why do you think consecutive days, bundle? I was assuming that spacing it out evenly would give her a better chance of feeling familiar with it - no big gaps between sessions.

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angel1976 · 16/10/2008 13:37

Hi julietbat, I read your message with interest... My DS will be going to nursery for 2 half-days (Thurs, Fri) starting in January. He will be 10.5 months then. He's 7.5 months at the moment, just cut his first tooth and has diarrhea to boot and is really miserable so I do feel for you having to send your DD to nursery while she is teething! The nursery actually has a full day for Thursday but as I intend for him to go more days when he is settled, they also advised me to do two half days and on consecutive days. They say in the experience, children generally settle better if they have two consecutive days. I guess it imprints in their little minds better? Good luck! I guess you could always give it a try and move the days around if it doesn't work. Let us know how it works out.

mppaw · 16/10/2008 13:47

My DD started nursery at 1yr, 1 day a week and it took 7 months for her not to cry when I dropped her !! In hindsight I would of done 2 consecutive days or half days.
HTH

julietbat · 16/10/2008 22:16

ok, think with all your advice I'm going to try Thurs and Fri mornings from next week. Annoyingly, I'm wondering if there was something else up with dd today to cause her tears because a couple of hours ago she vomited ALL her dinner up in her cot (much to her bemusement!). But i still think it's a good idea so we'll see how it goes. Thanks for your support, angel, it really was horrible leaving her this morning and I cried for a couple of hours at work! Think my students now think i'm a complete loon! I do feel more positive now that I have a bit of a plan. I'll keep you posted...

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angel1976 · 17/10/2008 09:49

Hi julietbat, you so have my sympathy! You sound like you have my DS! LOL... DS just vomitted up all his milk and brekkie from this morning but that was from crying and then coughing too hard. By the way, I don't think she has a cold, my DS has been snotty all week and it's due to teething. Even when he was sick, he was never THAT snotty. I know it's hard but when I have a bad day, I just try and tell myself that one day / one meal isn't going to make that much of an impression at their age... You sound like a really caring mum so please don't be too hard on yourself!

julietbat · 18/10/2008 17:21

Thanks angel, you sound like you're having a bit of a time of it too! I didn't realise the snottiness could be because of teething. that makes sense! can they get high temperatures too? poor little thing was really poorly yesterday with rampant diarrhea and a temp of 39. and she certainly seems to be in pain around her mouth too. but not sure if that's her existing two teeth still pushing up or if we're about to get another... oh the trials and tribulations of motherhood! best of luck with your ds - i know what you mean though, it can be hard not taking every setback as complete doom and gloom! i'm trying though...

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angel1976 · 18/10/2008 20:43

Hi julietbat, my LO is much better today... Still loose stools but at least not every 2 hours now... Yes, temperature can be due to teething as well. My LO doesn't have one but he's definitely very, very snotty! He got his first tooth on Monday but looks like he might get another one as he is stuffing everything into his mouth!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL... Take care, as long as my LO still has chubby thighs, I shall try not to worry!

julietbat · 18/10/2008 21:06

Glad to hear it. And I agree, chubby thighs make it all seem less worrying - and my little dd has had chubby thighs from the word go! She's still got diarrhoea but her temp has come back down to normal now and she's much more her wicked, smiling self, thank goodness The only thing I'm a little worried about is that she's got a slightly distended stomach at the moment. It's not sore or tender but it's certainly more pushed out than normal so think am going to have to take her to the docs to get it checked out. I hate being the over-worried mum but you can't take chances with such precious things, can you? Best of luck with that 2nd tooth xx

ps - don't know if you're breastfeeding but the arrival of teeth has made it a far more dangerous sport

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julietbat · 14/11/2008 10:25

Just wanted to update and say thanks to everyone for their suggestions - dd has now been going to nursery on a thurs and fri morning for a few weeks and things are soooooooo much better . She still cries when I leave her (but I'm not expecting that to change necessarily) but I know she stops straight away and the staff have been so lovely in making sure I feel supported in trying to settle her there. On her first really good day couple of weeks ago the staff took some photos of her and laminated them for me to prove how happy she'd been! That was thoughtful. Can't tell you what a weight has been lifted from my mind

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