Male worker and nappy changes

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In light of the recent criminal issue with the children being abused at the nursery by the male staff, what should I be asking my nursery about nappy changes? They are done in a big communal area accessed from both rooms. I don't think there is CCTV.

There is a male staff member. He's young and everyone else seems to like him.

yeah looking after children is a woman’s job.. probably why it’s remained so low Paid

its not weird to like children and want to work in a nursery as a man.

why is it ok for a man to be a football coach or a primary school teacher?

the male at our nursery is a kids entertainer and does loads of parties and stuff for little kids too and works at the nursery As the party entertaining isn’t enough as a stand alone job - it makes sense to work at a nursery too when his thing outside is literally doing kids birthdays 🤷‍♀️

So you’re also saying that women shouldn’t do traditionally male dominated jobs? Times have changed thankfully otherwise all doctors, police officers, forces personal and a whole host of other careers would only employ men!

One of the many reasons I’d never use a nursery. They love being woke at the expense of potential abuse of children. In my opinion it’s utterly bizarre for a young male to want to work in a nursery.

I feel exactly the same and I’m sure many of the super liberal types do really deep down but don’t want to be seen as being mean or discriminatory. I usually go with if something doesn’t feel correct and doesn’t sit right then there’s usually good reason.

Yes, no men have babies after all. I think they should outlaw all men being within 5m of a child, even if related to them as they obviously don’t care about them in the slightest.

I only trust my husband with my children. Nobody else has ever done their personal care, grandparents or anyone. Never any sleepovers. I remove as much risk of potential abuse for my children as humanely possible. I live my life, you live yours 😊

It didn’t feel right or sit right to a huge number of people that women should be doctors or police officers at one time. It wasn’t right to many that women should be mechanics, plumbers or decorators. Is this not the same?

Ask them what are their safeguarding arrangements - for naps, nappy changes/toilet visits.

You dont need to mention the sex of the worker.

Not at all, because overwhelmingly women don’t sexually abuse children anywhere near as much as men. Women can also not ‘technically’ be found guilty of rape. Women do not scare me, men do.

Well a lot of abusers are fathers (more than nursery workers, or grandparents), so you haven’t really removed the biggest risk. Unless you supervise him when doing it?

As I said, you do you and I’ll do me I’m happy with the safeguarding of my children 😊

Are you able to specify that only female workers do nappy change?

I'd only really want a setting with CCTV set up everywhere but inside the adult toilet cubicles.

I don't agree with this. Trust has no.place in safeguarding when it comes to the legal requirements in education. So why should parents just rely on trust? When there is national policy in place as a bear minimum?

Op read their Ofsted report. Make sure the staff have access to their mobile phones during the day. That the changing area isn't tucked away behind a closed door. Ask about changing routines. See if there more than one changing table in the room. If they all get a nappy change before sleep then you know there is more opportunity for someone else come in for a nappy change at any point.

Whistle blowing policy?

Trust is how grooming works. Not all predators are stupid and opportunistic. It's dangerous to presume they are thick and rude and give you a 'vibe' your gut won't help you.

It didn’t feel or sit right for a lot of people because women were seen as not being capable of being, for example a doctor, as they didn’t have the skills, weren’t seen as knowledgable nor had the mental abilities to perform in such roles. They were seen as dangerous, as a risk purely because of their sex. This is exactly how men are being perceived in traditionally female roles. Men can be seen as more of a risk in regards to sexual abuse but women are at risk of causing other types of abuse which is just as serious.

Children are at far more risk from family members and family friends.

I'm sorry but this comparison doesn't work, as women are actually just as capable as men in 99% of careers, so the discrimination against them was unfounded.

But a quick fact check will show you that men are a disproportionately enormous risk to children in comparison to women, especially in regards to sexual abuse, so any discrimination is in fact founded.

You ask them for nappy changes to be done if full view if another member of staff. So possible moving the nappy station to the corner of the room where it’s in the open for the other staff to see.

I have worked in a nursery where there had to be another member of staff in the room whilst you changed nappies and the nappy station was in the corner so private but open.

Other nurseries would have a room where we would take the children one by one.

Just remembered one nursery didn’t have a camera but did have a baby monitor that could be heard in the managers room.

Best practice is for staff members never to be fully alone and private with babies or children. Nappy changing area should be discreet but not wholly private. Eg screened from main sight lines but readily visible if you look.

That means no member of staff could feel they had sufficient privacy even for a moment to do something abusive.

Check that’s the case at your nursery. Look at the physical layout. But also ask the safeguarding questions several pps have suggested.

As lots have said, men are overwhelmingly more likely to commit sexual assault, but there have been a few cases of abusive female nursery workers and of idiot women taking photos to send to boyfriends. So this all applies irrespective of sex.

In ideal world childcare could be shared equally between the sexes, but in reality a significant proportion of men pose a threat to children, so we need to campaign for high standards and pay that reflects the importance of the work, rather than allowing the idea that it is for women to devalue it. When professions like medicine were limited to men, that was to reduce competition and keep salaries up. Somehow we allow the opposite to apply in those professions which are for much better reasons female-dominated.

@PurlantTelling me I’m a risk to my child is crossing the line into a personal attack. Reported.

I think the law should be any disabled non verbal child should not go into a separate room to have nappy changed by a male, too much going on with men sexual abuse at nursrys I've read 4 last year in uk, and had a DRB check, why do you think only 2% of workers in nursrys are male, I agree males can be good with kids but non verbal kids having nappys changed by male a NO

When I looked at nurseries, some had nappy change areas in a corner of the same room with high enough partitions around the changing table to protect baby’s privacy but staff in full view of other staff/ kids.

One had a nappy change area between 2 rooms (you could use it to walk through- staff only in emergency) but it had doors with glass at the top and the top half was completely see through from both sides with again dark wood at the level baby on changing mat was. But in this area 2 babies could be changed at the same time as each room had its ‘side’.

Some had a room alone out of sight of anyone- needless to say I didn’t choose one of these. Couldn’t be helped as it was the set up but not for me.

And I was also one who asked about males working there as I didn’t feel comfortable with my dd especially as a baby.

The main thing is no member of staff can be left alone. Our toilet and changing areas are in the main spaces of the room where other staff are constantly around. It would be pretty much impossible for someone to get away with anything , male or female - which is exactly what you need to see when choosing a nursery.

Male staff bring a refreshing dynamic to the type of play children experience and I have always considered it a good thing for children without other male role models in their early years.

Why? You'd change the at a baby group with relatives there?

The only way to fully protect your baby is to be with them and do nappy changes yourself- obviously that might mean a lifestyle change but just depends on what you prioritise.

who changes their baby in public? I’d go to the baby change.

It’s about dignity anyway.

Umm that all workers follow Ofsted, nursery and other guidelines about safe guarding and it isn’t about a man but about your child’s safety.

Otherwise YABU.