Nursery & potty training

[BH701]

Hi

My daughter has started nursery beginning of September, she was with a childminder before but wasn't fully potty trained when starting nursery (she's 3), they're getting frustrated she's struggling and putting pressure on me to get it done, saying they obviously can't be spending time trying to potty train, and asking if I can take a week off work to have her at home and to get it done. I've already done this right at the beginning, she's just got to the point where she's refusing to do it and all the pressure seems to be making it worse.

I thought nurseries were meant to support and help with that side of it, but has anyone got advice or experienced similar? Should I just take the week off? I don't even think that would do it, I think the week off would potentially make things worse.

Thank you

They will support, but you need to put the groundwork in. This is a huge change in everything she has ever known so you do need to devote time to it.

That’s a really poor attitude from the nursery. My dd wasn’t trained until 3.5. We had tried prior to this but she wasn’t having any of it. We communicated with nursery who tried to encourage her too but they were happy to do nappies while needed. We cracked it finally during the summer holidays after just a few days because she was ready. No amount of pressure from nursery or you will make it happen if they aren’t ready. Well it might, but it will be stressful for all involved.

It sounds like you have been putting in a lot of effort and it's frustrating if your nursery isn't that supportive. Seeing other children at nursery using the potty or reminded to go to use it, will normalise it, so it's a shame they're opting out. There is a good website called ERIC which is a UK bladder and bowel charity that offers advice on potty training. The longer you leave it, the harder it can become, so a week off work, with no nappy or pull ups, will hopefully get your daughter into using the potty. Good luck.

It depends on the nursery. One that takes babies and toddler should be helpful and supportive with potty training. One that takes children from 3+ will expect them to be potty trained. What sort of nursery is it?

Where are you with potty training now? Is she full time in pants but having accidents? Or she's still using nappies/pull ups?

Well at the moment they suggested pants, with pull ups over the top. To make her uncomfortable but that doesn't seem to work. She's just refusing to even sit on it when asked, we have tried just pants but she was weeing everywhere, so they suggested pull ups over it.

I took time off initially and she seemed to get it quickly and then went backwards and the nursery have said she just wants back control.

I think we'll go to just pants soon, and deal with it. But getting her to try to use the toilet at home results in huge tantrums and thrashing, and it becomes a stressful fight. I'm worried that the more stress will just make it worse.

I'll take a look on the website Eric and hopefully persevere! I just wasn't sure whether to stop then start again in a few weeks or just carry on!

Is it a private nursery or a school one? I have found school nurseries much less supportive of potty training in general and expect children to be trained before going.

Never had an issue with a private nursery, they were always extremely supportive from day 1 and took mine to the toilet every 30 mins at the start.