Splitting drop off / pick up with DH

[Hann376]

Hi trying to work out how best to split drop off / pick up with DH.

in your experience does it work best for one person to consistently do either morning drop off or pick up (rather than mixing it up on different days) and do children prefer mum or dad doing either? Wondering for example if my baby will be more upset at me saying goodbye in the morning so I should do pick up?

work wise we both wfh so not too much of issue either way

We mix it up, and it's never been an issue for either kid. I wouldn't over think it!

we mix it up if needed, but generally i will do both drop off and pick up one day and DH do both the other day. unless we need to rearrange for any reason. If DS has been out of nursery for a week or so (illness or the christmas break etc) I will get DH to do the first drop off to avoid any potential clingyness/upset to me at drop off. but DS generally loves nursery so it's never really a drama now. he doesn't mind if one of us drops and the other picks up either as we've done that a couple times too.

Same
It is good to get your kids used to flexibility from the onset. Those stuck in a routine are often the ones wailing when something has to change suddenly.

Several nurseries told me that children tend to do better with Dad doing drop off, and that seems to be very common where we are, so we mostly do that and I do pick up, but we do mix it up sometimes. To be honest, he’s unfussed about who picks him up!

We mix it up, I do it more, simply because my work is closer and its more convenient, but its fine

I've always had to do drop offs and DH pick ups due to work timings but I do wish it could have been the other way around as DC both clung to me crying at drop off and were not as bad the rare occasion he did it! I never got to chat about their day at pick up either so got very little info about how they were doing since drop off is always a busy, rushed affair. It also means packing bags the night before has always fallen to me since I'm doing the morning get ready and drop off stuff, so outfits, nappies, packed lunches if needed, world book day costumes, that's all me - I'm sure he'd "remember" more if it was him dropping off.

For us it works that I am default for both. I have reduced my hours to accommodate pick up and drop off of eldest at school so makes more sense for me to do youngest's nursery pick up and drop offs too.
BUT DH will tend to do Fridays (both pick up and drop off) most weeks as he wfh and has no early meetings on a Friday / finishes early.
He will also do a few nursery pick ups (probs 1-2 a week) so I can get dinner on / spent time with eldest and it usually works out that he is driving past the nursery at the time I would usually pick up.

We found DC were worse if DH dropped off. They tended to be more fussy than with me. Kind of like a 'No you are the wrong parent to be dropping off' scenario. With me they might get a bit upset up ultimately not kick up as much fuss as they were use to me doing it.