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Original poster

Help with nursery costs/returning to work

31 replies

Worldtravels · 27/01/2025 17:46

We would like to start trying for a baby soon. Just thinking about our situation and wondering if anyone has been in a similar position.

I am an NHS worker band 2
I take home £1600 per month, give or take after tax and pension. If I was to return to work after maternity leave, nursery fees are around £1700 per month for one child. Im struggling to think what would be best:

A, To return to work and pay my whole wage to them. Deal with the constant illness from nursery and never see my child. I am still paying in to a pension, keeping my job prospects open.

B, Don’t go back to work. Financially it will be the same for our household pot 💰

Either way I bring no money into this house and my husband would have to cover everything. I have read about the 30 hours of funding coming in 2025. I realise that it is not going to work out as 30 hours per week, for various reasons including the fact that it is 38 weeks per year. I think it will reduce the childcare bill so that is something I guess.

What have other people done who earn a similar amount to me?

Thanks

OP posts:
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FrannyScraps · 27/01/2025 17:49

Things to consider...

Using a childminder (often cheaper)

Being eligible for universal credit (you dint say your partners income)

Tax free childcare (saves another 20%)

Keeping in employment and pension contributions are important

Cantgetausername87 · 27/01/2025 17:53

Yeah tax free childcare (can be used with funded hours) or UC - also consider the funding.
I went back and effectively worked to pay nursery, but the long term benefits outweighed the cost and time spent away. I think another thing to consider is- will you have enough income from DH to stay at home and keep a toddler entertained with social opportunities - that swung it for me as I realised I'd be at home all day or just to the play park/ cheap toddler groups x

Teisen1990 · 27/01/2025 17:55

100% I'd stay at home in a heartbeat. They're only little once and juggling childcare, sickness and work has caused myself and peers to develop burnout

BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 27/01/2025 17:57

It's such a short period of time but a long-term massive hit to your finances that it's worth making it work

Plaided · 27/01/2025 18:00

I would 100% go back to work. Your partner should be sharing the childcare costs with you, so you’ll be taking home £1300. How will you be able to pay into your pension if you’re not working?

You’ll definitely be in a better financial position going back to work. With 30hrs and tax free childcare, your fees could be around £1000 or less. Ours went from £1200 to £650 and that doesn’t include the 20% tax free childcare.

The illnesses happen, it’s not constant, and again it’s a joint task to take time off work to look after them. If your partner’s job doesn’t allow this then I would be looking for a new job in his position as a bit of flexibility helps enormously.

Why would you not see your children? Do you have to work every weekend? If this is the case then it will be the same for the rest of their life. Can you look at something that has a more regular working pattern and a bit more flexibility?

Original poster
Worldtravels · 27/01/2025 18:35

To answer some questions husband is self employed so if he doesn’t work or is off sick he doesn’t earn any money. He earns enough for me to not work, after all I would losing my whole wage either through not working or paying it all out in childcare.

We would split the childcare bill of course, but it would all work out the same anyway. £1600 will go in my bank and £1600 will go out for nursery. The household income won’t change, so I have to weigh up if it’s really worth me leaving my 9 month old with strangers, when we both don’t gain any money by me doing so. This is only going to be temporary, a couple of years max. Then hopefully we will have more savings. I just ask myself is it worth it to leave my little baby for no gain? I wouldn’t mind so much if they are a toddler and are starting to gain some independence.

The only things to be gained are me paying into my pension, breaking up the day and giving me something to focus on, hopefully getting a pay rise etc. I am sure there are some benefits. I have explained the above to him and he is saying that if the equivalent of my wage coming in is just going to go out again in childcare fees, I should just stay at home. He wants me to, he’s told me not to worry about anything. He does earn more than me as well. Concerns for me are people judging me, my family not so much but my inlaws might try and put me down. The pension payments, and having independence, keeping my options open etc.

Or I could just take those first couple of years off, and then see how I feel. I work in a band 2 admin role, at the moment it is nothing I can’t step back into after a couple of years.

OP posts:
FrannyScraps · 27/01/2025 18:40

I don't understand where you're getting £1600 in nursery fees from?

Original poster
Worldtravels · 27/01/2025 18:42

I’ve checked my area, it’s £1600-1700 5 days a week full time

OP posts:
FrannyScraps · 27/01/2025 18:44

Worldtravels · 27/01/2025 18:42

I’ve checked my area, it’s £1600-1700 5 days a week full time

With 30 hours funded??

What about the other suggestions I made up top?

Honestly you sound like you're making excuses not to go back, which is fine, don't.

JimHalpertsWife · 27/01/2025 18:50

Why would you need to put your 9mo into nursery? You'll qualify for mat leave of 12 months, plus have your full year's annual leave on the end.

If you can afford to live on DHs income without the child, then why not start today in saving your entire wage every single month? That way you and dh will have a comfortable pot of money to pay out on childcare.

Returning to work with a 13mo, using the saved annual salary from today onwards, utilising the tax free childcare allowance, and the possible 30h funding, should all make it manageable to return ft and afford it.

Childcare ft for a little one would only be a few years. Your pension would suffer more from that loss.

Original poster
Worldtravels · 27/01/2025 19:13

I am not sure what entitlements we would get towards childcare? I was just reading about the 30 hours. Everything I read seemed to make out that it’s not actually 30 hours, as it is term time only, and then the nursery charges fees on top for supplies. Obviously that’s something I will enquire about in the future. I think it would still work out at a good discount price but I wonder if it is truly 30 hrs. Someone else mentioned tax free childcare, I will read up on this too.

I wasn’t saying I don’t want to work, you don’t know me at all (of course because this is an online forum) or you wouldn’t think that, I am really hard working and good with my money. I am trying to understand if staying home for a few years might work out better, if the financial side is not beneficial to us as a couple. I would rather not stay home all day with the baby, I like having my independence too.

Also the thought of not being able to contribute what I currently do to our mortgage and bills, makes me feel awful. I am just wondering that’s all, what others have done. I was fully expecting us to have to pay the full fee, and then maybe get some money off after the 30 hours is included, I am not quite sure how much that’s would leave the bill at.

Thank you all, a lot to think about. Perhaps with the 30 hours it wouldn’t be a total loss… I fully plan to save up, I have already cut down on my spending in preparation hopefully to conceive within the next couple of months 🤞husband is always good with money too. Had a very expensive year as we just bought a house, and have had to spend a lot inside, so no savings at the moment.

OP posts:
oneplustwoplustwoplusone · 27/01/2025 19:57

30 hours should make a bit of a dent in fees. Our fees our £90+, but £950 for 4 days a week then minus £500 a quarter with tax free childcare.

Does it have to be all or nothing though? Could you go back part time to keep your foot in the door?

Original poster
Worldtravels · 27/01/2025 20:07

Unfortunately my contract is full time, I could definitely ask if they would consider part time.

OP posts:
Scottishgirl85 · 27/01/2025 20:13

Where do you live? That seems awfully expensive. Your bill really won't be that much a month with all the schemes available.
It sounds like you don't want to go back, which is totally fine.

MissRachelismycoparent · 27/01/2025 20:24

We pay around £800 per month with 15 funded hours per week for 3 full days a month. OP your calculation won't be far off. It is soul destroying but it is only short term and the long term gain is worth short term pain IMO

Cantgetausername87 · 27/01/2025 20:26

So I'm South east England full time with 30 hours funding and I pay 1,100 for a private nursery. So unless you're in London, I think you'd have money left over. Plus you can use tax free childcare which is basically where you pay into an account and HMRC top it up 20% up to a max of £500 every 3 months. So that's something else x

Newmumburnout · 27/01/2025 21:08

You need to do the research and the maths first. The 1600 does not sounds correct. As others have said your entitlements make a massive difference

FosteringNewbie · 27/01/2025 21:15

I understand it being cheaper in lots of places, but I'm in the London borders and our nursery fees will be £1,950 AFTER 30 funded hours, so depending on where OP is it's definitely possible they're that high.

OP definitely run your projected earnings through a benefit calculator - some people on quite high incomes still qualify due to the childcare element, so you may get something there.

Francine84 · 27/01/2025 21:37

I honestly don't think your nursery fees will be anything like £1600 a month once the deductions are made. Our daughter's nursery charges £84 per day, but once you deduct the 15 hours free per week and tax-free childcare (20%) it works out as £32 per day, which is much more affordable. And once the 30 free hours kicks in it will be even less.

I was the same as you, totally dreading the nursery fees. But we're paying just over £500 a month for 4 days a week at nursery.

So I'm sure it's not as bad as you're anticipating OP! You could ask the nursery you're considering for a sample invoice so you can see exactly how much it will cost.

And you could always consider a childminder instead - cheaper and might be preferable for you compared to a nursery setting.

JimHalpertsWife · 27/01/2025 21:59

What is dhs usual monthly income?

AngharadM · 29/01/2025 16:58

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

ClassicBBQ · 29/01/2025 22:39

I stayed home with our 3 DCs because it would have been £4500 a month to send them to nursery! Once they went to preschool I worked part time so we didn't have to pay for childcare. They are all at school now and I still work part time, which works brilliantly for our family.

raysofhope · 29/01/2025 22:49

Whilst the financial side of the question is undoubtedly important, I feel it is also very relevant to take into account your preferences! I personally jumped at the chance to take a break from full tome
work - I love spending time with my toddler, and have gone very part-time until she is older.

mistymorning12 · 29/01/2025 22:53

I would definitely ask to go part-time. Fixed shifts.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 29/01/2025 23:01

I think you need to think about your career beyond the nursey years and your pension - would your husband give you half his pre tax salary and pay into a private pension pot for you?

Why do you see the nursery bill as just being your duty - it's half each of proportion of earnings each. It enables two of you to go to work, not just you.