I've got bad feeling about a nursery from the first day

[Theanova]

Hi all, I hope you can give me some perspective and advice. I have a bit of a gut sinking feeling with my son's nursery. Today was his 1st day and I've been dreading it as it is but after today I'm not any more relaxed. Viewing was great, Ofsted is outstanding, nursery setting is beautiful. We go to a toddler activity class behind their building so he has met most teachers and they were really nice and kind to him. He is doing half days to start with the hope of moving onto full days. Before his start, they were great at coming back to me and discussing any concerns I had. There are no settling sessions but since we met the teachers, our visit was great, the Ofsted report and the Montessori set up + the app you can get regular updates and photos, I kind of put my worry about it to rest. Now my problem today was, I arrive and I'm told they have no internet but will send messages with updates. On the of start, they have failed to deliver what I was promised on his start date! An hour and a half into his session, I got a message saying he's not settling well with sharing toys with other kids and it might be best to come pick him up early. That's all. I do and I do witness him getting upset over a boy who took the toy away from him and the teacher (not head teacher, my son and I got along very well but another one I never met before) instead of explaining properly what's what, she tells my son 'dont, 'my son's name' no!' with a very reprimanding voice. Which I didn't say anything to but didn't like it. He is a bright boy and does well understanding what you tell him, which calms him down to cope with the situation. I do have to repeat myself but if that's what he needs, that's what I do and would for any child. I also asked multiple times, did he ask for us, she ignored me 4 times before answering as she saw I won't let it go, by 'yes, of course but it's normal, he will go to the door calling you occasionally but he will stop eventually'. She was more busy joking about the weather and how she chose the wrong foot wear for today 😒 Also, he hasn't had his water bottle out of his bag and I have not been given any report on what he's drank or snack on (he is dairy free), I saw him eat a bread stick when I arrived which is ok but I'm just wondering how his day went and I was barely told anything. Is this normal? Is this the reality of how nurseries are? Are my expectations too much? I am FTM and he's over 2 years old and I've solely taken care of him myself so my anxiety at the moment is through the roof.

Thank you!

I agree. Kids that age don’t share, it’s not developmentally normal. It’s not even sharing, it’s taking turns.

Hi all, I'm not sure if this will work as an update (I am new to this platform).
So 1st, there were reasons to why we chose this nursery and they were all very strong reasons. 1. It is a Montessori nursery and we love their values and practices (at least by reading) 2. I know people who spoke highly of it 3. As mentioned, my son has interacted with all teachers but the one I didn't like how she interacted with my son on his 1st day and his head teacher was absolutely amazing!
So, after not sleeping the night I posted this, wondering what would be the best option, I decided to reach out and discuss what happened that day and this is what it transpired 1. Their whole telecommunication network was down, no phones or internet so the head teacher spent her day trying to resolve that so she wasn't actually present for his whole session (only the first 40min and he was doing great then) 2. The teacher in question is new and the head teacher said she is struggling with adapting to her new environment as the establishment she used to work in was more school set up and she going through training and what I raised as concern will be implemented into her training (basically what I gather is that she came from authoritarian set up to 'led by children' set up guided with more compassion and understanding behind the behaviours and she is struggling with the difference in approach). 3. Head teacher has moved my son into her key children and knowing how she interacts with him I know he will be happy and 4. She was absolutely apologetic and understanding of my worries, did not dismiss any of it and said she needs to know all of this to make sure the nursery values are upheld and improvements are implemented when needed and to never stop advocating for my son with them. He's had his 2nd day in now and it has been exactly what it was promised before he started, he seemed extremely happy, he's eaten, drank and been changed. He didn't cry all day (only when he saw me picking him up ❤️) and apparently he also shared with other kids on his own too. I am giving it a go as it's been 50/50 so far but if I get even a hint he hasn't been treated with kindness and consideration, I'll be withdrawing him immediately.

Thank you all for taking the time to reply to my post and help me figure it out 🙏🏻