Is this allowed? Nursery Workers Husband.

[PlumFairies]

Hi,
An acquaintance of mine is married to someone who was found guilty and went to prison for historic abuse of an underage teenage girl around 8 years ago.
I’ve just found out she is now working in the local nursery. Would an offence like that show up on a DBS check? As although I know she committed no crime she is married to and lives at the same address as one.
I had hoped to sent my LO to that nursery but am having enormous doubts over whether I could put my faith in them to safeguard my child.

Disqualification by association only applies to childminders in domestic settings, now.

He will most likely have had some restrictions placed on him upon release, so as long as he is abiding by them, there is no rule broken.

It should be noted that a DBS check is a snapshot in time and only reveals convictions. A clear DBS does not mean a staff member has not broken the law, just that they haven't been convicted. Nor does it mean they are not capable of breaking the law in the future.

A quick trawl of the TRA hearings and outcomes will show you that a clear DBS does not eliminate risk.

My daughter worked in a support role in a school and had to make an annual declaration as to whether she was in a relationship with or lived with anyone with a criminal record for safeguarding matters

That SHOULD show up on an enhanced DBS check. The staff member obviously can't have a particularly strong negative view of child abuse. I would not send my child there.

It makes her choices look highly questionable at the very least. And would you want someone with bad decision making skills in charge of your child's safety and wellbeing without you there?

I would feel uncomfortable because this would make me seriously question her judgment. I would expect (hope?) that someone who is paid to care for children would be the biggest advocate for protecting them from sexual abuse, certainly not to be living with a convicted child abuser.

While I get he wouldn’t have direct access to my child, I would be concerned about cases where women caring for children abused/took inappropriate photos of the children in their care for the sick gratification of their pedophile partners. Perhaps the pedophile is dating her precisely because of her regular, intimate access to children, which is disturbing but also a possibility.

It’s true that child abusers are everywhere and you’ll never catch them all but if I have confirmed information about one at least I can act on it to protect my children from any unnecessary contact.

I wouldn’t worry about a risk of the man getting any access to your child, but I agree with you and some of the others that I’d question the type person that was in a relationship with a sex offender, especially one with a minor, looking after children.
I’d also question the integrity/safety of business that employs them.

Cases of women taking photos and abusing children in their care for their abusive partner.

Huge red flag.

Never heard of this before

I think this is tricky. I work with vulnerable children and found out that my ex was engaging with iioc. He was out of my house that night and for me that was immediately the end of the marriage. But I also had to burn my entire life to the ground in the process... I had to move away, change my job, I lost friends, my pets, me and my child are still homeless because of it while waiting on our house selling, never mind the legal fees I have to pay, plus the fear of new people I meet judging me for my exes actions makes me feel very anxious about meeting new people so I have no friends or supports where I've moved to. There's also the impact on my child who lost their parent overnight as well as all their extended family who we had to move away from. And some people really did expect me to stay. Never mind the fear about the fact that at some point my ex will look for contact with our child which makes me feel sick.

I feel incredibly lucky that I was mentally and financially in a position to leave quickly but not all women would be in that position, or they'd feel they don't want to risk unsupervised contact happening with their children that they can't be present for.

I found that the police hugely minimised my husbands crime and it was extremely difficult for me to get any clear information on what he'd actually done and the scale/ nature of it. I still don't know the truth of it all and if he pleads guilty I never will. So it would be very easy for someone in her position to be gaslit, or lied to or to feel trapped and unable to leave. Plus the main support networks online that I was recommended to use, i found to be very apologetic and sympathetic to perpetrators. I work in safeguarding so I knew better but the narrative really shocked me - it would be the last thing someone reeling from that shock would need to be seeing.

So I just think that it doesn't necessarily mean she has no moral fibre, or that she's complicit or that she thinks it's ok or even that she's naieve - she just may feel stuck with him or she's been provided with no support or decent information. I'd be disgusted if anyone felt I wasn't fit to do my job because of what he had done.

If it was a child minder that would be a problem but not a nursery worker as presumably he's not allowed on site

I wouldn't want my child looked after by somebody who will not take a stand against a sex offender, so much so that they are in a relationship with them.

They've just proved that if they spot abuse, they are far less likely than a random person off the street to report it, as they've already proved they will stand by someone who has done this.

Change nurseries.

I used to be a nursery nurse and while I agree that criminal offences of other household members should not be on other household members dbs checks, I don't think you're unreasonable to have concerns. I have seems husbands and boyfriends other family members of staff be allowed to be around the kids and it's one of the reasons I quit because it wasn't the only safeguarding problems staff would ignore too.

I worked in the same place for over ten years with no issue and it was a brilliant environment but then it was sold and the new owner was shockingly useless. Had her husband, brother, adult son, and allowed the new staff she employed to bring boyfriends in.

I was dismissed repeatedly raising this issue, my boss got very angry with me when I said we should maybe be doing proper checks on the boyfriends and husbands etc if they're gonna be frequently around the kids like they were being, she told me I basically accused her husband, son and father of having bad intentions towards the kids and that there's no harm in them having a bit play or chat with the kids. I handed my notice in and reported them, not just for this but other ignoring of safeguarding policies too.

As long as the husband doesn't ever go to the nursery it should make no difference to your DC. The person working at the nursery must have passed an enhanced DBS or they would not be employed at a child nursery. You can't blame other people who live at the same address as an offender.

You rely on nursery workers not only to not abuse your children, but also to whistle blow or call out others if they spot red flags or abuse.

Whistle blowing is an incredibly hard thing to do as it risks your work relationships, possibly your job. You don't want to entrust your child's safety from abusers to someone who's already proven they may not do this.

My concern would be nursery parents asking for baby sitting

I think living with someone with a conviction should to be honest. It wouldn't take much extra to add a section declaring household occupants, and living with a sex offender shows an acceptance of that and is a huge risk.
Most female sex offenders do so under the influence of males.

@XmasSocks we were asked to disclose any change of living arrangements and if anyone in the household had convictions to do with crimes against children -it’s not that uncommon I don’t think-we were reminded annually as part of our annual review.It started after the case in PlyMouth where a nursery worker was using a mobile phone to take pictures and abusing children to show her boyfriend.I personally have no issue at all with doing that.

I prob would have to confront her. Make her question her own decision making. I presume she knows about his conviction??

I know I'll get flamed for jumping to conclusions here but it's not impossible to think that she could be taking photos for him when changing nappies - these scenarios have happened exactly like that before. The woman wanted to please her man, was desperate to keep him, so she did it. Ended up in prison, quite rightly

No, her DBS check would not cover her partner. Just imagine if your ex was an abuser and it showed up on YOUR DBS? That would be horrific.
It's just for that individual. If her husband were to work there then that might raise red flags as he probably wouldn't pass. I guess I would worry she was not of good character so that would put me off sending my kid.

I used to work for a children's activity where this WOULD be an issue, but that was only because of the access to children's records that we had at home.

For a non management nursery nurse then this would probably not be an issue. The nursery is probably aware and can put safeguards in place.

I wouldn’t send my child there. Even if the criminal has no direct contact with the children,it brings into question the nursery worker’s judgement

I would not want her near my child.

Choosing to live and be in a relationship with someone convincted of child sex abuse is almost as bad as being the abuser.

She should be nowhere near children. I’d be extremely concerned that she’s deliberately sought out a job involving contact with young children.

She may be taking photos of the children in her care, she can’t be trusted to report signs of abuse by colleagues or any safeguarding issues, she has sex with a man who gets his kicks from sexually abusing children. She’s morally repugnant with a total lack of judgement.

I’d write to the nursery and make them aware of the situation.

Obviously he’s not in direct contact with the children, but it’s not unheard of for predators to use their partners to gain photographic material of minors, I believe it has happened in the UK before. This sounds really awful of me to ask, but is the historic allegation of a small child/baby?

The start of the op says it's a teenage girl.