Am I being paranoid about ds' nursery?

[theUrbanNixie]

I chose ds' nursery because it's got a homely feel, a lot of the worker's there are mums themselves who have similar views on parenting to me. But lately they've been phoning me for every little thing and he didn't spend any time there last week! Today they've phoned me to pick him up because he's had a runny bum but he's fine in himself and not poorly at all.

Also he's got several bitemarks on his arm and when i asked if he'd been biting himself they were very vague and just said "Oh it happened just now" but they wouldn't say if he'd done it himself or if another child had been biting him. Now I know children bite each other and my ds is no angel, but if he's been bitten I'd like to know!!

Another thing is that when they take the kids to the park, he's always the one in the single buggy. I've asked them if there's a reason for this but again they've been very vague. I don't mind if there's a reason, and i don't really care what the reason is but i'd like to feel reassured!

Am i being paranoid? Feel free to come and give me a slap!!

FWIW:

runny bum - if they have a D&V bug going round then they are probably right to be paranoid

bite marks - no, they shouldn't be so casual

buggies - I would let that one go if DS seems happy

hmm i know what you're saying about the D&V bug, but he's absolutely fine in himself and i think the runny poo could be down to the fact that he's still breastfed at night and had rather a lot of breastmilk last night!! he's always had very loose stools and i don't think it's anything sinister.

what do you think i should do wrt to the biting?

Re the biting - can only give you point of view as mother of biter . My ds (22 months at time) bit other children twice at nursery. The procedure was this: it was recorded, both sets of parents were told but the children were not identified. I did ask for my apologies to be passed on tho) Ds obviously had it explained to him that this was 'not acceptable behaviour' or whatever terminology they are allowed to use. (I told him biting was naughty and it made his friends cry) I'd be quite upset if the nursery hadn't noticed whether it was self-inflicted or not. Even worse for them not to notice another child biting him - since it's likely there would have been a loud scream (ds bit me once too - it bloody hurt!)

Re: runny bum - my son's nursery don't allow any child with diaorrhea into the nursery, including for 48 hours after they are better, so that's probably quite standard, I would imagine. Doesn't matter if they are 'ill' or not.

re: biting - not acceptable. They should have an accident book where they report these things and tell you straight away at the end of the nursery day. If they genuinely didn't see what happened, they should be honest with you about that.

ds is a biter as well (and a pincher, and a hitter, and a kicker!) so i'm not too fussed if another child did bite him as i know it's only what he'd do given half the chance! but i would like to know if he was bitten, for my own peace of mind as much as anything else.

he's only 15 months, so too young for any kind of discipline or consequences.

What to do about the biting? IMO, collar the manager or DS's key worker and ask what the policy is - and then raise as non-confrontationally as possible the fact that a vague 'oh it happened just now' is not in line with policy (which it won't be!)