Breastfeed toddler attending nursery

[BlueMaya]

Hi,

So, I had planned for my 18 month to start nursery next September when she would be 2 years and 3 months. I work full-time and have family support from older children (17+20) and my mum overseeing everything.

DD’s behaviour can be unmanageable at times and I can see how hard it can be to manage her. I feel she needs constant stimulation and wants the freedom to play and run around.

I have now approached a nursery that has capacity to take her from January, however the guilt is absolutely killing me. I feel awful and very anxious that something might happen to her. We will be visiting in 2 weeks which might make me feel better. I’ve checked the ofsted rating and it is good and the nursery has plenty of positive reviews.

My main issue other than the guilt is she has a nap around 12 noon and that is usually me breastfeeding her and her falling asleep. She wouldn’t take a dummy or a bottle but will now sometimes have a few suckles from a bottle of it has water or cows milk in it.

Has anyone been in this situation and have nursery staff been able to get a breastfed baby to nap whilst at nursery. She will be going 9-3 and these are set times.

Desperate mama after some reassurance ☹️

My breastfed 15 month old has been in nursery two days a week since 10.5 months. She naps like a dream for nursery, my mum or my husband. I feed to sleep for bedtime and naps on my days off. She’ll be fine!

First of all - an 18mo is still a baby, and a 2y 3m toddler most definitely isn't. The child you'll be sending to nursery will be hugely different to the one you have at home today.

Second, at 2y she's not likely to be looking for breastfeeds if you're not there. She'll know it's just something she can get from you.

Lastly - breastfed babies (actual babies under a year) start nursery and learn to nap. She'll be grand. Mine were both fed to sleep when they started at 10mo and had no issues.

This is very reassuring, thank you. Can I ask where do babies sleep when they are in nursery? My mind is coming with a lot of intrusive thoughts which I’m battling with at the moment!

I work in a nursery and we get many breastfed babies. They nap absolutely fine here!

Thank you, can I ask where do babies sleep when they are at nursery. I know they will probably show me and explain on our visit, but again just after some reassurance x

Where they sleep will depend on the nursery, but for my children's nursery once they are 2 and in the toddler room they nap on mats on the floor with a blanket if they want one, and it amazes me that they can get 10 toddlers to all nap at the same time! They are literally magicians!

My daughter started at a similar age. I think she had just weaned but still needed lots of cuddles from me for naps/ bedtime.

Her first couple of nap times she cried and they comforted her (held her hand) and she slept, and then after that she was fine (would talk and talk and then conk out.) They slept on mats in the same room with blankets.

Your child may get upset at the change, but that's normal. It's having faith that they will comfort her and take good care of her - throughout the day, not just at nap time.

My DD was the most boob obsessed, fed-to-sleep toddler/baby you can imagine and within 2 weeks was napping like a pro in bed at nursery with no issues, while still being boob obsessed at home. I learned some time later 2 of her friends were also still fed to sleep at home but you'd never guess at nursery as they all just climbed in their little beds and went off to sleep at nap time. I wish I'd known not to worry because I spent so much energy on it and it all worked out fine really quickly xxx

They sleep in prams outside in the baby room and then mats outside but under cover in the older rooms. This is a Montessori nursery.

As a previous nursery nurse let me reassure you that your little one will nap there no problem at all! Having said that, it sounds like you're got an active and enquiring little munchkin who would particularly thrive in a forest school environment. Have you looked into forest school nurseries at all?

Our babies sleep in cots until they start to transition to the older room where they get used to mats. We can use buggies for naps so long as parents give consent as this isn't considered safe sleep practice.

Mine started full time nursery at 7 months, exclusively breastfed. She did fine. Never took any milk there, pumped, formula, or later cow. But she was a good eater and liked water too. They had no issues with naps at all. It'll be OK :)

Edited to add - she still breastfeeds a lot now, and turns 3 in January 😅

At two they sleep on mats on the floor, you can send her own blanket in and any comforter that will help her settle.

Just to add another reassuring story, my LO started nursery in Sept 2 days a week at 10 months, with me she's breastfed to sleep at night and either breastfed to sleep in carrier or falls asleep in car/moving pushchair. At nursery they pop her in a pram for sleep, other babies are in cots or on mats on the floor, they're really flexible. I don't send her with any milk but she manages the whole day 9-6 bless her. She eats plenty of solids instead! She also usually has two naps at home but somehow manages with just the after-lunch nap they do for all the babies at nursery. They're more adaptable than we give them credit for sometimes ☺️