Remember my 'My 3 year old hates nursery' thread... and I took him out, well I need your help again ...

[Disenchanted]

I took him out of the school nursery and started taking him and his little brother to the library and stuff instead.

Well we started to go to the surestart centre and he enjoyed it. It was stay and play and 'movement time' ect ... I stayed there watching and hes been doing OK. He still refuses to sit at th table and drink juice and stuff.

Anyway, I enquired about a place at the nursery group for him yesterday, very casually and they just rang me and offered him a place!

It will be 3 mornigns a week, 9 - 11.30,

so not massive hours but im worried.

I just took him out of the nursery at school and not Im thinking about putting him in here?!

But I dont know if it would be good for him!

its 2 days a week less, theres no uniform here either...

I really dont know!

Another thing is going through the crying again

But DH has been signed off work for a month, so if i wanted I could get him to do nursery duty for the next 4 weeks and hopefully by then he will be settled?

What do you think??

Looks like Ive had my mind made up for me!

The lady who runs the playgroup said that she had already sent the 'headcount' of child off and that the cutoff is 17th April, but to ring them and see if they can make an exception (meaning we are intitled to free playgroup place for him but we should have been registered by 17th april)

But the man on the phone said there was nothing he could do so if we wanted him to go we would have to pay.

It would only be 12 pounds a week but we haven't got that

12 a week comes upto 48 a month so I think we will just continue with the stay and play thing!

Ah well!

at least you don't have to worry about making the right decision.
But if he likes it maybe he could start at the next head count?
Just to mention that ds hated his nursery, crying when i left him and still miserable when i picked him up. As my work situation changed he went 2 mornings to that nursery and i started him 2 mornings in a different playgroup. He was a completely different boy at that playgroup, never cried never clung to me etc
So although he may not like one place he may be allright at the other place

Thanks, thats what I was hoping, that he may be OK at this one, but now I wont know!

Am a bit about ringing her to tell her we can't afford to pay!

I would definitely take up a place before your DS is due to start school. Legally he has to start the term after he is 5 - hopefully by then he will be confident about you not being there and will enjoy the interaction with the other children. If you can't afford the fees, why not delay until September when he will be a little older. It is often the children who have never been left with anyone other than close family that suffer separation anxiety the most but with kindly, caring staff they will support you and your DS until he no longer needs the support. You perhaps also should bear in mind that in September there is likely to be a lot of new children starting at the nursery group so you won't be alone.

I hope this has been of help. I am a pre-school worker and we have had many children that take a while to settle down but they get there in the end with the right support and care.

Incidentally the funding is one of the reasons many schools take children before they are 5 - they do a headcount and receive government funding for each child on the register, so the more heads they count, the greater the funding they receive. There is a cut off point in each term and after that date, they cannot claim funding for that child which is probably why they would want you to pay.

Disenchanted: I can assure you that if its truly a SureStart Centre, they will not turn you down if you can't afford the fees. An aquaintance of mine manages a SureStart Centre and have a couple of children on the books who can't afford the fees.

You will probably have to 'prove' that you can't afford the fees or that paying the fees would cause hardship. Please don't be offended by this; its to ensure that the subsidy goes to those who REALLYcan't afford the fess as oppose to someone who is looking into economising the household budget.

Please enquire. The staff should help you. If not, come back and tell us about it and we'll see if we can help out.

if he is 3 he is entiteld to funded sessions that you don;t need to pay for?

Government funding is based on a head count at provisions by a certain date in each term. Once that date has passed, you cannot claim funding for children starting after that date, until the head count in the following term. That would explain why the nursery has asked the parent to pay, as otherwise the nursery would be out of pocket.

Yes thats right dippy, the cut off was last week. So we would have to pay.

Most areas (we have in essex) have provision to have a child added after headcount day (which for us is not until 1st May) you get funded for the number of eligable weeks left in the term, it might be worth you checking with council.