Changing nursery dilemma - help!

[Nellie1027]

So I'll try and make this as short as possible, but I'm not the best at that. Grateful to anyone who reads to the end.

I have a nearly 2 year old and a baby due in January. My little girl started nursery in January. We chose the nursery primarily because it's the only nursery in our area that allows shift booking. I work 8-6 Monday-Wednesday but my husband works shifts (day and evening). This allows us to book her into nursery when we are both working but keep her at home with either of us when not working. For some weeks she doesn't need to do to nursery due to the way my husband's shifts work.

It wouldn't have been my first choice nursery. The outside space isn't great and it's a bit tired and worn. But my LG settled in and was doing ok. We were also able to save a substantial amount on nursery fees.

Fast forward to now. It's pending an Ofsted inspection report since 1st July, still not published. Has had a few complaints raised on the Ofsted website. Staff leaving regularly. Seems chaotic and she's come home having not napped all day (definitely not ready for this!) and with dried snot caked to her face. I've started feeling awful about sending her in. Some days it seems fine, others I get a bad feeling. The pending Ofsted (whilst I know not everything) is making me uncomfortable given how long it's taking, it just can't be good.

We are contemplating moving her. There's another nursery nearby we have good recommendations about. However would mean booking her in for the days I work every week, and they would be long days 7:30-6:30. Less time spent with my husband. And about £400+ more a month (including funded hours). Would make finances quite tricky.

I feel so torn between her going to a nursery I don't feel comfortable with but not going as often because she doesn't have to and us having more money to spend on doing things together as a family and less stress financially. To sending her to a better nursery (at least I think) with lots of good recommendations from other parents for much more of the week, but my LG having much less 1:1 time with my husband and much less money.

I'm also going on maternity in January and whilst that means she could go less I really will need the break and time with the new baby.

I'm finding it really hard to know what's the best thing to do.

I also haven't approached our current nursery about how I feel in regard to her care as it's just been minor things that have built up. I'm just not sure how best to do that?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I'm not the best at making decisions and my husband's not much help!

First of all, do you feel she's safe there? If they arr presentation issues then I would think that's easily resolvable with a conversation with the nursery manager. I often picked up DD and she had whatevers dinner caked all over her. Simple conversation and they took more care with her. Could save you the anxiety and costly finances.

If you feel she's not safe then there's nothing to resolve then move her to the other nursery

@Washingdamachine I'm finding it hard to know that as it's such a small snapshot of the day we see. It just seems so chaotic sometimes and as if they aren't in ratio, and given the amount of staff that's left I wouldn't be surprised if this was the case.

I agree with you regarding the safety though, I don't think this would be something I'd be questioning myself over if I genuinely thought she wasn't safe. It's more that I'm not sure how much supervision she gets and organised activity. I just get this feeling they let them run wild all day. I should probably just ask I know.

My husband did speak with them about the nap and snot and they had their reasons (although ones I don't particularly agree with). I completely understand children come home dirty, that doesn't bother me but snot all over her face does as that's simple to clean and bodily fluid.

She doesn't have to be in for the additional hours if you didn't want her too. Yes I appreciate you'd have to still pay but your dh could still have as much time with her as now if he wanted.

Keep her there until Jan, then look for one that does half days or shorter sessions while on Mat leave (a preschool style settting)

@Tulip8 you're right, this is something I'd like to discuss with the other nursery to see if they'd be ok with this. Some weeks she doesn't have to go to nursery at all though, so would mean paying for 3 days for no reason. But yes, it's an option

@TickingAlongNicely unfortunately I don't feel this is possible as I don't want to move her more times than I need and I'd be going back to work in January 2026 on the same hours as I am now, so she'd need the long days. I wouldn't want to move her twice. Our new little baby will need to go too. But thank you for the suggestion

How old will your daughter be in January 2026? If she starts school on the September 2026 they she will be moving then anyway. I think that leaving her where she is may prove better as you will be able to save the money you would have had to pay for hours you don't need at the second nursery. Worst case scenario your current nursery closes while you are on maternity leave and you have to have both children with you for a while. You'd still be saving money so by January 2026 you can make a decision that is best for you then.

If there are complaints published on the Ofsted website then that means that something not right was happening - Ofsted only publish complaints if the EYFS requirements weren't being followed when inspectors checked, and either the owner took action to sort it out or they had to be told by Ofsted to sort it out. That could be attendance registers weren't being properly kept, or the nursery was out of ratio by one child. Or it could be children weren't properly supervised, were seen doing something dangerous, staff haven't had proper safeguarding training or DBS checks - it can be quite a range. So what was the enforcement action related to, and is that something you are worried about? Is it something linked to the concerns you have yourself, where you think maybe the owners have told Ofsted they've done XYZ to sort it out but in practice it's still not good?

High staff turnover tends to be a bad sign. You can't get consistency of care, really knowing the children, and proper planning and development if there's a constant parade of new staff. And it probably means the working conditions aren't great, which doesn't motivate staff to do their best with the children.

If they had an inspection on 1 July and the report still isn't published then the owner is probably challenging the grade, as that puts things on hold until it's all resolved.

There's no need to send her more often to the other nursery or for her to have less time with your husband just because you want to get your money's worth - if you can afford the extra £400 it makes no difference whether you use the hours or not.
Do what's best for your daughter.

@givemushypeasachance thank you, that's so helpful to know how it works. It seems complaints have been raised about the supervision of children. These have been resolved but I feel unsure it's been resolved satisfactorily. She has been in nursery this week and seems to have enjoyed herself so I feel even more conflicted now but we are viewing the other nursery tomorrow so we will see.

@qualifiedazure you're right, we can, the extra money would really stretch us and mean we can't afford other activities like her swimming lessons etc so it's not as simple as just sucking it up and not sending her when I have that in the back of my mind.

@Lurkingonasunfay she will be starting school in September 2027, this also crossed my mind when I was thinking about it all too and I thought the same. Thanks for your response, it's good to know everyone thinks differently in a way because then I know it's not such a clear cut decision I should just be making easily!

Just wanted to update you all as you all spent the time responding to me which I'm very grateful for.

The Ofsted report came out and it was worse than we expected. Basically came down to poor staffing and deployment across the rooms leading to children being unsupervised, putting fingers in plug sockets, throwing things at fans, and just a general risk of harm. Luckily (for us!) all criticism was related to the toddler and preschool room and she is still in the baby room, but due to go up to the toddler room in a matter of weeks.

So we've managed to get her a place at a lovely nursery nearby starting on the 4th November and luckily she doesn't need to go into nursery much between then and now.

Thank you for all your advice. It's been really helpful having different opinions and thoughts on the situation and whilst the report was bad, has helped to make the decision easier for us.

Ouch, sounds like something went really wrong at that nursery and leaving was a good idea.

DS was 2.5 when I had my second and sending him to nursery has been a godsend. For him, so he has interaction with children his own age. For baby, so that I can give him undivided attention. And for me, so that I can have a break. But I had the same guilt about taking him whilst I’m off work so even though our nursery is open from 8-6, I tend to drop DS off between 10-11 so he can have a chill morning rather than rushing to get out the front door, and I pick him up at 5, so that he’s not having long days. Just an option if you ever feel bad sending her that you don’t necessarily have to follow their long days.