Nursery allowed toddler to fall asleep in playground???

[GHIHRU2021]

Hi,

just wanted to pick your thoughts. My 2.5 year old started a private nursery this week. 5 hours per morning 2 x per week. She was fine at the settling in session but has not really struggling since.

day 1 - crying, playing for a bit, picked her up
asleep infront of a doormat. She wouldn’t settle in the bedding they provide. Red in the face and seemed like she had the worse time.

day 2 - they told me she was fine but fell asleep in the playground??!! They tried picking her up to bring her in but she just ran away. Eventually she slept inside when all the kids were brought in. But again I found her in the doorway on the mat.

she doesn’t eat anything. She doesn’t want them changing her nappy. The nursery are not good at updating the app to keep me informed.

have I made a mistake? Also, I don’t know how I feel
about her falling asleep in the playground. She wouldn’t have fallen asleep straight away so must have been left unnoticed for abit? Or am I overthinking this?

2 days Op

2 days!

Do you need to send her? I would hold off for another while if you don’t.

How did you find her asleep on the doormat? Surely when someone inside the nursery went to open the door to let you in they would have seen her there and picked her up? Also, if she ran off when she was asleep on the playground, then she wasn’t asleep, but just lying down? Why is she even having a nap when she’s only there in the morning?

Sorry, I wasn’t clear. It’s the doormat going to the playground. Not the main door. She was red in the face and upset.

the key worker said she was asleep. So that’s what worried me, it’s one thing laying down but to say she fell asleep makes me think they hadn’t noticed her lay down in the first place.

i would rather hold off, but health worker said that she is behind on her social communication and this might help. Also, I work those two days so need the childcare.

she is there from 8-1 which includes a nap time for all the children

Give her more time to settle. It's all still brand new to her and it is a big adjustment!

i may just be overreacting and overthinking. It’s my first so I did t know what to expect

It's only 2 days, see how she goes.

It's common at the nursery mine go to for the little ones to take themselves off to the book corner for a lie down if they're feeling tired. Your DD has chosen somewhere slightly more unconventional but for whatever reason it's where she feels comfortable.

Does it matter where she sleeps? With a bit more time she might copy the other children. 2 days in she needs at least 12 weeks to settle when she’s not there that much

It does take a while for them to settle at nursery I find, I wouldn't panic about it 2 days in!

My youngest wouldn't nap in a cot when he first started (he was 13 months) so they asked me if I would agree to them trying him on a floor bed and since then that's where hes slept, on a mat on the floor. But I've also watched staff hold babies and toddlers while they're sleeping if that's the only way they slept.

One of mine used to occasionally lie down and have a nap out on dog walks. Didn't want to get back in the buggy, would just do that all fours hunched up, bum in the air position and instantly sleep. On the pavement , on the grass, wherever. Then I could pick him up and put him the buggy.

Night time was a different thing entirely! 🤦‍♀️

I wouldn't worry after only 2 days. If she has never been in childcare before, it may take her longer to settle than one who has been going since a baby

She has been there 2 days OP! Having had NO nursery experience before by the sound of it.

By end of the summer you will almost certainly have a very different child.

Upset two year olds can fall asleep in an instant at nursery. They do it almost as a reflexive shutdown. Nice warm day, she wouldn't have been left alone or unnoticed - if she was distressed she might have rejected cuddles or activities from someone she doesn't know. Please give her a chance to settle in.

Very very early days!

We put in son in for the same reasons as you off the advise of HV and honestly it was so hard, they had to peel him off me but I stuck to it and he ended up running in without saying goodbye. He loved it and brought him on so much.

In regards to eating, it took my son a month. He would just have a slice of bread with butter in off them.

Nappy changing, she will get there. She'll be feeling a little scared as it's all new but she will learn to trust/love them.

Napping, does she normally have a nap within that time frame? Could you say no to the nap and do it once home?
I'm not sure how I'd feel DS sleeping at the door tbh.

What are the nursery doing here to help her? Have you got photos of the setting and staff and activity plans so that you can talk her through what to expect when she's there? Are they using a visual timetable and talking her through the morning? It's less about time to settle and more about expertise in settling toddlers I think.

My LO took 6 weeks to fully settle going 4 days a week!
hang in there, she may end up loving it x

They tend to be most unsettled when starting between 2-3yo. They have a strong attachment to their parents plus they have the two year old anger about not having/doing what they want which can be a volatile combo!

It is quite common for them to refuse any comfort from the adults who are still strangers to them in the first few days. They often will sit by the doors or gates and getting upset means they do get tired and fall asleep in odd places.

However this stage does pass quickly. In a week or two they will have realised that there are fun things to do, the adults become familiar and they feel safe going to them. You may find there are tears at drop off but pretty soon they will be telling you the tears stop the moment you leave. They may still cry at pick up as they anticipate your return.

I would give it a month and they should be mostly settled by that point.

All the children have a nap within those times?
I would expect a 2.5 year old to go 5 hours without needing a nap.
It all sounds a bit odd to me!