Stressing - Nurseries waiting lists and finding new job after mat leave

[CharlotteB94]

Hello!

We've just today had an offer accepted on a house in Godalming and I'm 21 weeks pregnant with a baby boy. We live in London at the moment so it's not been possible to look into nurseries for now as we didn't know where exactly we'd be living.

We're so excited but I've just fired off some emails to nurseries today and excitement is already mixing with stress! I'm working at the moment but not happy at my 5 day a week in London job & there's no flexibility. I'm planning to take 12 months mat leave and find a new PT hybrid job ideally 3 days a week, starting roughly 12 months after baby. Otherwise I will be looking for freelance work 3 days a week.

The mortgage we're signing up to is not cheap, although we love the house and it's perfect for us (area/deposit/mortgage interest rates!) and we'll be pretty tight living on one salary. I'll be on SMP while off.

So nearly all the nurseries in the area that I've heard back from are already at waiting list for Sept/Oct 2025 (some till 2026?!) when I'm planning to go back and are asking me to sign up ASAP for the waiting lists.

I know individual nurseries have their own policy but looking for some advice on:

• Start dates - do I need to commit to a start date now when putting down his name? Can you shift this date at all? We would really struggle to be paying for nursery to keep his place open, if I hadn't found a job starting by the time he's due to go. Also, how to plan any settling in days now? I don't even know when I'd be starting work!

• Days of the week - again, literally no idea what days of the week a new employer would potentially want me to work. Do they let you confirm exact dates nearer to the time generally?

• Availability - if I put name down on every practical nursery nearby and no places came up by a month before, I have no idea how I'd manage this?

We have no family in the nearby area and this is all new to me - it's so difficult knowing what to do when there are so many variables and it's SO far ahead?!

Any knowledge anyone can share would be MUCH appreciated!

Settling in days would be booked much nearer the time, so that’s not something you have to worry about.

I would think about putting baby down for a full time space and tweaking later.

When you say there is no flexibility at your current job - they are obliged to at least consider part time.

Does your DH intend to do part time or wfh?

I’d be careful what you are signing up to if you are going on more than one waiting list. Just check there no financial penalties if you don’t take up the space.

Beware that there are not anywhere near the childcare spaces available to cope with the number of children who are going to be wanting places, due to the ‘free’ 15/30 hours offered, so they are going to be very in demand, likely to be expensive and unfortunately, liable to closing suddenly due to an inability to continue as a viable business. Three around here have closed their doors completely recently and the others are only accepting private places-not taking the funding at all as it isn’t worth their while and they don’t need to-there are so many people prepared to pay the full price as they need the space.

Will you not be applying for these part time
jobs until after the baby is born?

@SheilaFentiman - DH will be working full time but WFH 2 days a week. I'm more worried about being held to an exact nursery start date when I don't know my exact return to work date!

@Redlocks30 , thank you for your reply. I think we'd have to pay deposits to be on the waiting lists. It sounds like a nightmare if the place closes and you're due back at work! So difficult.

I'd not be able to apply for a new position more than 4 months ahead, new employers wouldn't hire that far in advance I doubt. Certainly not in my industry - a three month notice period is fairly standard. Makes it pretty difficult with nursery places being booked up 1.5 years in advance though!

People drop out of waiting lists though. We put our name down at two nurseries to be on the safe side and then withdrew from one once we got in at the other.

What about childminders in the area?

Nurseries tend to be fullest from April to Aug and the have spaces come up in September as their 4 year olds go to school (so the 3 year olds more up to the pre school room, and everyone else who is old enough moves up a room).

I would get on one or two nursery waiting lists (but check the T&C’s) that you can give notice before your little one is due yo start without incurring any costs.

Honesty it mostly depends on the specific nursery. But one of the hardest things about managing a childcare setting is maximising your ratios, which gives little flexibility. Settings want to be as full as possible, otherwise they’re not financially viable.

Id look at going on a couple of waiting lists. Check the T&Cs re deposit, how much you lose, would you pay a notice period to drop days. Consider signing up for Mon-Thurs, Fridays are generally the quietest days so you’re more likely to be able to add a Friday, and it’s commonly a day off in part time work.

You may need to budget to start on a certain date no matter what. You’ll be due holiday pay at the end of your maternity leave - if you can afford it I’d suggest that is a useful buffer in case you have to pay for nursery before you want it.

Thanks everyone - I've paid to go on two waiting lists, one for the nursery we want and one for another one which looks ok, so I'll have to just wait in hope a place comes up at one of them when I need it.

I'm not sure if it's just where we'll be living but every single nursery was booked so I can't really afford to pay £70-100 multiple times over in non-refundable fees to not be guaranteed a place.. Pretty bleak! I will just have to hope that a place becomes available.