Refused a nursery place

[Cashew22]

Just come here to moan, really. I've kind of accidentally ended up as a stay-at-home mum to a nearly 2 year-old and I am desperate to get her into childcare. My daughter was on a waiting list to start at the local nursery shortly after she turned 2 in April. I (naively) thought that she already had a place and that the nursery would have let me know if they didn't have a spot for her, so I felt confident that this phase as a full-time parent was nearly at an end. Naturally I love my daughter, but I am completely sick of spending all day everyday with her, and to be honest she's probably quite bored of me too.

I've just been told that there is no place for her starting in April. They can put her on the list for September, but without any guarantees for that either. She is on a (much longer) waiting list for another nursery in our town, but I don't anticipate that they will have a spot for her anytime soon as it is a very small centre. If I had known earlier that there would be no place for her then I would have put down her name at several childcare centres as backups. Today I made a couple of additional applications to local nurseries on the off-chance a spot opens up quickly but really I know that it's too late and that nothing will be available anytime soon.

I'm so fed up and frustrated. Thinking that she would be in nursery was keeping me going. She does go to a nanny on a flexible basis once a week, but it is far too expensive for us to do full-time, or really at all. We are hemorrhaging money, but I can't go back to work until we have affordable and reliable childcare so it's a Catch-22. I'm trying to look for a childminder with immediate availability, but finding it challenging. The situation with childcare in this country sucks so badly and I'm so angry right now.

The new funded hours from April has put an increased pressure on the already stretched sector.

Try childcare.co.uk. , local Facebook pages and word of mouth.

I knew it was an over-stretched sector. I hadn't accounted for just how much of a scrum it is to get places. I had no idea going into parenthood that you practically needed to sign up as soon as getting a positive pregnancy test.

I'm looking on childcare.uk as we speak, but it is an equally frustrating process. It seems like nobody keeps an updated account, so half the childminders who say that they have availability are actually fully booked or are no longer working. It's just such a rubbish situation. We are lucky in that we can make it work with only my husband's earnings, but at the moment I feel stuck at home with my toddler while my CV quietly rots and I'm totally bored and miserable.

Oh no! Have you tried school nurseries? Some take from aged 2, and even those that are 3, at least you could registered now. Often they’re less popular than the day nurseries as they’re term time only and 9-3, so useless if you work, but they can be great for SAHPs needing a much deserved break and for DC to socialise!

The nursery we put her down for was essentially a school nursery in the sense that it was term only and 8.45-2.45, although it is not officially attached to a school. So, as you say, useless for working parents. I can't think of any other school nurseries within our area. I do have her name down for a full-time nursery in our area, with the idea that she would start term-time at our local nursery and then go to the full-time nursery once she was a bit older. I've now written to them to ask for the earliest start date possible, but I don't think it's likely they will have a start date soon. My only hope is that a local childminder might have a spot soon.

Do you know anyone who uses a CM? If so ask for a personal recommendation, CM's around here only take on families the loosely know, they can afford to be super selective and only take form families who are vouched for as not being a PITA.

My nursery I was 20 weeks pregnant when I registered his place to start when he was 11 months old!

My second baby I registered when I was 8 weeks pregnant to start when he was 11 months old.

It's beyond crazy.

Interesting. Unfortunately I don't really know people who use a childminder. The parents I know are pretty much all SAHMs or people who work part-time and have their child in nursery on their work days. I'll ask around since word-of-mouth is the only place I've ever had any luck before, but I'm not overly hopeful.

Have you tried private schools? Just a thought as they often have nurseries that are no more expensive than any other nursery, and so long as you know when you need to give notice there’s no obligation to stay on for reception, and you can apply for a state school place as normal presuming that’s what you want. The other advantage of school nurseries are places are more likely to come up as a qualified teacher can look after 13 3YOs. Just get on all the waiting lists and hopefully something will prevail soon. Good luck!

See I always thought that was a bit of a joke and nobody actually did that. Then I fell pregnant in September with my second and while I was writing to the full-time nursery to put my daughter on the waiting list I happened to mention that we were expecting another one and wanted a nursery place for him/her from around 14 months so could we make an application as soon as the new baby was born? The nursery manager told me to make an application right then for both my daughter and my first trimester fetus! It was surreal. Unfortunately we lost that baby at 11 weeks so it's no longer relevant, but I will definitely be applying pre-birth if we ever have another. It's a ridiculous system.

I'm definitely getting on all the waiting lists that I can. Unfortunately they all take deposits so, while I don't mind losing the odd £20, there's a limit to how much money I can throw away on the off-chance that a place opens up early. The private schools all seem to offer from 3 and up.

Does it help if you can send them just a couple of days a week? Mondays and Fridays might be quieter at nursery. That maybe doesn't help if you are trying to work unless you can find something part time but might save your sanity if you can afford it!

Contact all the childminders for now perhaps? As well as adding to the nurseries that you really want. Not ideal but some children will leave in July and some in September from both, less mid year

Yes, I'm trying to do this. Not ideal, as younsay, but hopefully someone will have a spot open.