not settling- what to do

[hettie]

Hi there,
I have been taking ds (just turned 1) to my uni nursery for half a day a week for the last 5 weeks. Last two weeks he has cried and clung to me when I've droped him off. They tell me he settles down after 10 min and happily plays/does activities.... but I hate him getting so upset. Nursery seem lovely and are concerned too. He doesn't want to be left and in that state I don't really want to leave him. He was fine initialy but this time as soon as we got to the door he started crying . I also leave him with a friend one day a week and he got upset this week when I left him (been ok in past). Anyone any ideas as to what is going on and any suggestions as to what I can do? Please help I am finding it really hard.

It is really difficult leaving them like that, but he will get used to it. At that age they know who their significant people are and don't like change much. It actually may help if you can leave him 2-3 times per week at the nursery so that its not a one off IYSWIM. Basically, because it is infrequent he thinks it is a one off and forgets about it by the following week. Therefore he goes through the upset every week.
Could you pop in and take a look at him during a break but not let him see you, just to put your mind at rest?

I agree with tori, once a week is just not enough for him to settle and get used to routine change.
We see it time and time again, if a child only comes once or twice spaces out sessions the child will cry for weeks.

could you either book him in for 3 or 4 sessions one week to get him used to it then maybe either get him to go twice a week.

mmme makes sense..... thing is its just not poss for him to go more (complicated, nursery is not in same town as home, can't get nursery in him town due to having to be in other town too early.....)

ds has been going to a childminder for about the same amount of time, he goes for two consecutive days a week. settling has been really hard but we have had illness in the middle which has been difficult. he still cried this week but settled just as i was leaving through the front door and cms have told me he has been great all day.

dd used to go two days and for months she cried when i dropped her but by the time i have got back to my car and peered through the window she was fine.

could you leave him twice a week at the nursery?

i do see what everyone says about 2 days but its just not poss. He seems to have a memory for nursey (ie its not 'new' like being left each time) as he starts to cry when he spots the door . ....... will try a new goign in room with him again (did this for first 4 weeks and he was fine)