Problems in our nursery

9 replies

Appletree0812 · 04/05/2023 15:34

Hi,

We have just moved to the Netherlands and we both (me and my husband) got a job offer so I thought it would be nice for my daugther to start nursery. She is 2years and 3 months old. I need your opinion if I am oversensitive and it's normal to every nursery or there are better ones.
On our first day they didn't know we were coming. A girl told us to go in but she couldn't answer to any of our question regarding settling in time. She eventually went and ask someone, she just told me to leave my daughter without asking anything about her. She has allergy so I wanted to speak about it and she is only half way potty trained. She told me I could wait for her superviser but it will be 1 and a half hour wait. So went in to the room and waited. I thought she will encouring my daugther to join but we have been fully ignored. Her supervisor arrived and took me to another room to talk about her. She didn't ask how is she, what she likes or anything about jer. Just asked about the allergy because I said to her colleague. During this time my daugther were crying a lot she wanted me. This other girl tried a little bit to settle them sat down and was watching my daughter crying for me. She convencied me to leave . So I left for an hour. When I came back she was sitting crying alone. All other adult were a few steps away and no one seem to care.
Second session. I told them I wanted to stay to make her more comfortable and told about my concerns but they didn't let me to stay she said she will take care of her. When I was leaving I told her where her clothes were in case they need to change it ( I need to wash her clothes different way because of her allergy which I told her on the first day) and her answer was they have theirs own.
She again cried a lot in 1 and half hour but this the my daugther was on her lap trying to comfort her when I came to pick her up. But this person won't be in all next week so it means there will be an another person who may ignore her. I have seen little baby eating sand , dirty nose children , no soap for them to wash hand and they don't eat any cooked food dueing they. Do you think these are red flags and would you take your child out or this is something normal? I feel stressed taking her there and I don't trust them. :(

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Bamboozleme · 04/05/2023 15:37

I don't trust them

irrespective of the detail… I would never I left my child in the care of someone I don’t trust

Jellycats4life · 04/05/2023 15:37

That sounds bad. If you don’t trust them, don’t use them.

TeddyBeans · 04/05/2023 15:38

I have no experience of nurseries in the Netherlands but if you're not happy then take her out. Are there other nurseries near you that she could go to instead?

thaisweetchill · 04/05/2023 15:45

The fact they didn't know you were starting is a big red flag for me. I also echo another poster and say if you don't trust them I wouldn't be leaving my child there.

monotonemusings · 04/05/2023 15:52

Follow your gut instinct

Bamboozleme · 04/05/2023 16:00

Despite your child having an allergy and needing to wear clothes washed by you… you just accepted the nursery saying that she will wear their spare clothes? 😐

Tumbleweed101 · 07/05/2023 11:43

There should have been someone to take charge when you arrived and management should have made sure the room staff knew they would have a new child to settle. We usually to at least two short settle sessions where the child can explore and we can chat with the parent about the child's likes/dislikes/other issue and answer questions.

unfortunateevents · 07/05/2023 11:57

My eldest son went to nursery for a bit in NL, although about 20 years ago so my info may be out of date, but honestly it doesn't sound as if much has changed. Nurseries (and child care in general) are run very differently in NL, reflecting the very no-nonsense attitude of the country in general. When we were there, ratios were higher, there seemed to be no requirements to follow any kind of educational (in the absolute broadest sense of the word) activities, fewer toys and games than you find in a UK setting, lots of food items that you would never see here etc. I'm completely unsurprised to find that they didn't take on board your information about your daughter's allergies, when we were there peanut butter was served constantly at lunch - nothing wrong with that but even 20 years ago you would never see that in a UK nursery.

I suggest you try to speak to other expat parents about their childcare arrangements, you may have chosen a particularly poor nursery but I think you will find in general that they run much more "robustly" there and we ended up using a nanny to enable me to work.

Original poster

Appletree0812 · 10/05/2023 12:44

Thanks for the reply everyone. We went to 2 more sessions and one of the staff was really nice and my daugther had a good time on her last session but she stayed only until lunch. We went in today and at first she was happy , she meant to sleep in today but there were a change between staffs again and they had no idea we were coming .. again... I tried to talk to them about her sleeping routin but they didn't really care and also my daugther were seeing me standing there longer and waiting she started to cry for me again,so I left with my daugther and decided not take her back anymore.
I called the finance department to end our contract .. first she said I would have to pay for an another month and she would get the manager to give me a call. 1 hours later I got an email they finish my contract today and never recieved a call from manager which is another proof they don't care... :(

OP posts:

Flip