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Should I move nurseries

2 replies

HeyDuggeesFavouriteSquirrel · 22/09/2022 15:08

My son has just started at a school nursery that is part of a private school.

The nursery is great and he seems really happy there. I think the environment works for him better than his previous day care as he's really interested in letters and numbers and they foster those interests.

However there's two issues. Firstly my son refuses to potty train and he'll withhold his wee basically until he can't anymore (I've posted about this in the potty training thread). However, the school don't allow nappies and he must go in pants. Because of this and the withholding, he's only allowed to do mornings which is a shame for him as he misses out on afternoon activities (swimming, ballet, music). And it's a pain for me as he's only in for four hours a day and I've had to get extra childcare on some days and on others I can't get anything done as I have such a narrow window of time.

The school is very supportive and they're trying to get him to go to the toilet there but nothing so far.

It's so hard to get him to wear pants in the morning and I feel terrible, like I'm traumatising him as he knows he'll have to hold his wee in all morning. The other problem is the school require a uniform. It's just a comfy tracksuit but he hates it and wants to choose his own clothes. He's very young for the year and only just turned three, I feel like I'm forcing him to grow up too quickly but conversely he loves it when he gets there and the activities are great for him.

I have already paid a hefty deposit and the first terms fees. The school own another nursery which is more separate from the school, I went to visit and it's a little more babyish, they allow nappies and there's no uniform. They're also a bit more flexible with arrival time and days off. But on the other hand not so focussed on learning. I don't mean that in pushy parent way but my son genuinely loves phonics etc. There might be a chance to transfer the deposit there so there is an option to move him.

However I don't want to keep moving him around as it's so unsettling plus he might love the uniform next week as they change so quickly! He's only been there two weeks so I don't want to do anything hasty yet equally I'm worried he'll get ill from not weeing and our mornings are so stressful with the battle over the uniform.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
themonkeysnuts · 04/10/2022 18:52

Unless you can get him to use the toilet then i would move him and see how it goes you may be able to move back after a term or two
just because they are not doing phonics it doesnt mean its a 'babyish' nursery (they may be doing phonics just not in a formal way)

SunshineClouds1 · 05/10/2022 18:40

I wouldn't be pushing the potty training tbh if he's not interested, the putting pants on him and him holding his wee can make him ill.

Uniform, a lot of nursery's attached to a school require a uniform so it would be no different elsewhere unless it's a private setting.

My child loves his alphabet and numbers, we've kept him in his private nursery until reception and he does all of this.

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