3rd Day at KG in Germany and DS is crying for me...

[cheechymunchy]

Please can someone lift my chin and say it's normal. DS went to nursery from 9 months old back in the UK and loved being there, didn't miss me except very occasionally for a few minutes.
Been over here for 6 months and finally got place for DS in nearest KG after appealing (8 weeks until birth of 2nd child and not well there...). I thought he'd be fine but knew in the back of my mind he'd be confused and a little scared sometimes, at the beginning. Today he was fine when I left but after 5 minutes was crying for me. He's asleep at home at the moment (half days to settle him in) and in his sleep he started crying out "Where's mummy gone. I want to go back home".
I feel SO sad

Almost every child I've ever looked after, at this age- 13m-2yish- has a clingy cry, at 1st session, more often 2nd, and particularly at pick-up time. It's like a switch, they all seem to cry when being picked-up, just to make parents feel bad and nursery nurses too!

DONT WORRY (yet)- they all do this! If it continues after say a week, 2 weeks, then have think. Have you had a good chat with the staff? are they concerned?

Hiya,
Yes, the staff are concerned, particularly as they will not speak English to him (we want him to learn German). They came up with suggestions yesterday to talk about how I come back to collect him. It worked at home until we walked there this morning. The closer we got, the more panicked he got. There were no tears, but he was clearly upset and clingy. I stayed for 15 minutes, letting him show me all the new toys in the classroom, then one of the staff distracted him with a favourite and explained to him that mummy is going to say Tschuss and come back later. I got a kiss goodbye but this morning is taking SO long.
I'm not going to take him out of Kindergarten, unless they insist. He needs company other than mine and is clearly bored at home with me.
Fingers crossed for 12 noon when I get him.

How did it go? I do think persisting is the best way to go, I've known parent pull out children after one go and I always wonder how they go- does mummy tell primary teacher on first day that little darling is shy etc, labelling them for school.

My last nanny job was in Belgium, British family in Flemish area. Charge was 2 1/2 so older but the school she started while I was there only spoke Flemish to them, she seemed fine and there were other language children ther- no English in her class though.

I do think settling a child at this age is a gradual process. Some seem fine at first, then go mad at second drop-off, some just get clingy, some hysterical. Its hard, as I found this week- 1st time I ever dropped off a child who cried for me, I know he'd settle but they know how to pull your heartstrings!

It seems the staff speak good English, you communicate well? or do you speak German? Providing communication is good, and you feel he is recieving good care, persist!

Good luck!

Ds1 was teary once or twice.
Ds2 howled for 2 weeks and I spend those on the sofa outside the room feeding & changing 4 wk-old dd before I could venture away for half-hourly stints. He was inconsolable and the teachers not as good as in ds1's group who would sit the child on their laps and occupy them and reassure mother & child.
Dd howled a few times but she was in ds1's old group and anyway I was hardened by then and scarpered
Rotten even with child no. 3 to hear them sobbing as you leave.

The kiga teachers would all speak English to the children in situations where the child was so clearly upset and could only explain in English what was wrong. Sometimes it was also the frustration of not being able to say what they wanted in German that upset them.

Your ds is so little & it's all so new. Give him time.
Chin up