Anxiety leaving child at nursery

[Rani123]

First time mum, will be sending my little one to nursery at 11monthd old. I know he needs to go to learn and develop etc. My anxiety sky rocketed the other day when we went to visit a potential nursery and I saw one of the staff members cradling a child to sleep and another feeding, there was nothing wrong in what was going on but seeing it made me so guilty that a stranger will be doing that to my little boy.

For context most time my baby self soothes himself to sleep but just seeing it made me feel so guilty.

Am I totally bonkers and at what point does this feeling go away, I'm totally dreading returning to work for this reason. The playing with other kids I have no issues with.

Your child doesn’t need to go to a nursery to socialise unless you’re working and need childcare.

My DS is 16 now but I still remember the name of every member of staff who cared for him at nursery. When he went through an autism diagnosis (which took two years) they were my family's biggest cheerleaders and allies. He spent 4 and a half years in their care, three days a week and each and every one of them were brilliant, in their own ways.

In other words, try and adjust your thinking: this isn't someone taking something away from you, this is more people joining your team to help you care for your DC.

(I do know it's hard by the way and I cried every day I dropped him off in the first couple of weeks, but you'll get there.)

Totally agree with @MaChienEstUnDick

My son adores the staff at his nursery. He shouts for them at home.
They have been incredible with his care.

My relationships with them are great and I go to them for a lot of things.
You'll find you'll build up lovely relationships with them also.

If your baby is more than happy to self soothe just tell them, he may need a cuddle or two whilst he settles in.

Your anxiety and nerves are totally normal. Whilst your son settles in you also as a parent need to settle into the new routine.

Don't be afraid to have a little cry or ring them anytime.

I totally get your anxiety, but honestly nursery workers (in a good nursery) are magic workers! My DS started at 11 months and at home he needed dummies and white noise to go to sleep but from the first day he was at nursery he slept without both!

He's been there 3 years now and he absolutely loves it. Makes it so much easier to leave him there knowing he is well looked after and thriving.

Thank you, I do need to return to work otherwise would have had him at home a little longer. I just do t want to him to miss out.

I am now thinking that I return to work part time for a short while to help us both adjust to our new lives.

The carers in a good nursery will quickly become trusted adults to your baby, not strangers. Part of their extended 'family'. This helps them develop trust with others. As is said, it takes a village to raise a child, this is part of your village.

Thank you all I appreciate all your responses. I guess I need to start slow and work up. I know it will be good for him and me it's just trying to get around the separation anxiety

@FelicityPike

Your child doesn’t need to go to a nursery to socialise unless you’re working and need childcare.

This is very true.

@Tumbleweed101

The carers in a good nursery will quickly become trusted adults to your baby, not strangers. Part of their extended 'family'. This helps them develop trust with others. As is said, it takes a village to raise a child, this is part of your village.

Totally agree with this.

Our son is as comfortable with his nursery caters as his own family, and I trust them all implicitly to do what's best for my child.

It's always harder on us leaving them the first few times. DS went happily from the very first day and never once was upset, it was me who was unsettled initially!

Part time might work. I started off sending DS in full time and soon realised I needed to switch to part time and it was for both of us. If part time is an option, I'd recommend.

@Veryverycalmnow this is what I'm considering starting back part time and seeing how that goes.