1/2 days at nursery

[Emmalwells]

My daughter is 14 months old and has been going to nursery for 2 half days for nearly 3 months. We are constantly getting calls from nursery saying how unsettled she is and emotional. When we get pictures they are giving her a dummy (which she doesn’t have unless she’s asleep at home) this tells me she’s been upset and they are trying to calm her down. Also she isn’t herself and their feedback is she loves cuddles and quiet time which just isn’t my child! She is so happy and loud at home and never sits still.

So I am stuck what to do! Nursery have suggested full days but at the moment I can’t see how that would help she isn’t aware of time! How can I leave her longer knowing she can’t make it to 10am without me getting a call. Do I try a different nursery or keep going? Has anyone else had this problem? Do I pull her and have family look after her but I worry she’s missing out and she loves being with other kids! Any help is much appreciated.

@BugMummy yeh we have just been discussing if maybe a day and a half would be ok money wise as it's not such a big increase! Just hope that would help! Be much easier if she could talk!!!

Could you afford an extra half day, so she does Thursday afternoon and all day Friday, or Thursday all day and Friday morning?

Ah sorry I didn't see your last update! Do you use the tax free childcare?

I'd look at other nurseries. My DS does 2 half days. He's only started about 6 weeks ago and is still settling but the staff work so hard with him I've never had a call. His is a small setting where there are only 6 kids max & they're all around the same age over 1 but under 3

@girlmom21 yeh we use the tax free childcare. We may be able to stretch to 1 and a half days 🤞🏻

@daisyducky this is what I was wondering! The nursery she is in at the moment is very big and a franchise! So I am going to look at the smaller ones to see if maybe she would be better there with more one on one time! Just not sure what's the best thing to do 😞

[quote Emma1508]@Kayjay2018 aw I'm glad you managed to find something that worked for your little one! Was it full days in nursery before you decided to move to a childminder? [/quote]
We were starting with a few hours and building up to half then full days, she never made it beyond 2.5 hours before they called me to take her home. I was really frustrated with them as she was just over 6 months, born in the first lockdown so really really limited opportunity time away from me which they acknowledged at the start, just weren't able to support in reality. I wasn't really prepared for it as my son had gone in so easily with no fuss. (I'm a qualified nursery nurse although doing a completely different job these days so I have an understanding of nursery life). She is really blossoming at the childminders so it was the correct decision for us, I was lucky to find one quite easily as she had just lost some children to school.

We've always done half fays but wr do 5 so she goes every morning, only 2 half days isn't that much time out of her week if you think of it that way

I’ve just moved from 2 half days to two full days (9 to 3) for this reason.

@Fallagain and how's it been since you have changed to full days?

She has only done it twice but generally it is much better.

I disagree.....would anyone say a child would only settle with gran or aunty if they went full days or every day. Your lo needs to feel secure with the person looking after them a consistent key worker. As a childminder I will have met you and lo 3 to 6 times before you leave them with me. The first time for an hour or so then building up. If baby settles we step it up if they don't we do more days until they are happy. I've had children for half a day once a week a few times never a problem.

I would take her out. A 14 month old doesn't need to mix with other children at a nursery. They can socialise with mum present at a playgroup a couple of times a week or have play time with family and friends. So if you have family child care available I would just do that for a few months and try again when she's 18 months or so. If you have no other choice then I would still suggest try a different nursery or childminder.

Nursery isn't right for every child. Agree with pp, a 14 mo doesn't need to socialise with their own age group at that age, so if you have family who can assist (for free!) then definitely take this up until your child is a bit older. Childminder is a good alternative for a home from home setting.

Just to reassure you from the half day perspective, my children only ever did half day childcare until starting Reception and settling was not an issue. We used childminders until 2.5/3yrs old because preferred home setting and the childminder recommended more than 2 days for settling so they both did 4/5 mornings until settled then dropped to 2 until I needed more days for work.

I agree that they don't need to go full days in order to settle but probably do need more than 2 half days, at least until settled before reducing the hours

I'd be looking at a childminder if I was in your position. Or family if they are willing and you feel comfortable with that.
Not everyone is cut out for busy nursery days and a tiny person won't miss out on anything they need by not going.