Starting Nursery at 12 months. When is a good time?

[Greenisland101]

My son has turned 1 and my husband and I are looking to send him to nursery 2 mornings a week. Both my mum and mil, disagree with the idea. They think he's way too young and it's not necessary as they believe he should start when he turns 3. I would like ds to join to develop social skills. My parents are in their early 70's, still mobile and active, and they don't mind looking after their grandson but I really feel that a nursery setting would be beneficial.
Did anyone send their child to nursery at that age just for socialising or wait until it's free at 3 years old?

I think your second post has changed what I was going to put.

I would have said the same as the first page of replies - there is no point in putting a 12month old into Nursery "to socialise", but I suspect that people were presuming (from your OP) that you were at home with him and were responding on that premise.

Now you have said you are talking about childcare and whether there is value in a couple of days at Nursery vs older Grandparents putting them in front of TV / tablets for much of the day, that is an entirely different question.

So yes, now you are talking about stimulation and different activities vs lack of interaction and stimulation, I'd definitely suggest Nursery if you can afford it.

Wow, can’t believe that your parents are willing to look after your child 4 days a week for the next 2 years, having done the same for your nephew! Wish mine had offered that!

A practical consideration…What will happen if grandparents are away/sick one week? Will that cause problems with childcare? If the nursery is 52 weeks a year you have more flexibility than with family.

To answer your question, I think it depends on the child. Both of mine went to nursery 3 days a week (2 full days, 2 mornings) from 12 months when I went back to work. One of them loved it and the other didn’t settle well at all. If you have a child who doesn’t settle into nursery, grandparents might be a better option. My child who loved nursery gained a great deal from it - even at 12 months old. Grandparents could never have produced so many fun activities.

Ultimately, only you can really compare grandparents vs nursery for your child.

If it's the choice between granny or nursery, then nursery wins everytime.

Mine started at 9 and 12 months 3-4 days a week. It's a perfectly fine time to send them to nursery. Will they benefit much from the socialisation before 2? No, not really. It's mostly for your benefit, so you can work and have time to do other things you need. But realistically, I do think at that age nursery is probably better than being with older family members, unless your parents are particularly capable. I know ours wouldn't be able to offer the level of attention and stimulation that a nursery would.

Your update has changed things for me too. It's perfectly fine to think your child would be better off in nursery than with grandparents. 4 days is a lot for them and will be tiring. I'd be tempted to maybe do 2 days grandparents 2 days nursery.

My son was in nursery from 15-17 months, then lockdown 17-21 months, then nursery again. His development definately DID stall when when he was at home and ramped back up at nursery.