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Nurseries

Find nursery advice from other Mumsnetters on our Nursery forum. For more guidance on early years development, sign up for Mumsnet Ages & Stages emails.

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Original poster

Is 9 months too young for nursery?

32 replies

RMarieClaire · 26/05/2021 22:34

I’m having a dilemma over when to return to work. Can I ask if anyone here put their kids in nursery before a year? An opportunity has come up at work to take on a maternity role in the new year, but my new baby will only be 9 months old. It’ll ultimately be full time but only 2 days in the office and our nursery is 3 doors down the road from us so I can still breastfeed him in the day on those days and could even have him nap at home. My eldest LOVES nursery but didn’t start till 13 months. It would be a great position for me but the guilt is overwhelming. My boy is only 5 weeks old so impossible to know if he’ll take to it as well as his sister.

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ChocOrange1 · 26/05/2021 22:39

Not personally but I know plenty of kids who started nursery before the age of 1 and were fine. It's sometimes easier for them at that age because they're too young to have much separation anxiety, which I found peaked at about 13 months

motogogo · 26/05/2021 22:42

It was normal at 6 months when mine were small because maternity was shorter. In the USA 6 weeks is common! Ideally babies are with their mums until later but circumstances mean you need to do what is best all around

Pandasarecool · 26/05/2021 22:45

Due to our jobs (short maternity leave) my colleague had to put her daughter in at 3 months old. It was for only one day weekly though as she couldn’t get close family to help for all the days she needed. She’s 2 years old now and still attends the same nursery.

welshweasel · 26/05/2021 22:48

Mine went full time at 4 months and 5 months, no issues at all. I wanted to get back to work, they were well cared for and very happy.

Bambam2019 · 26/05/2021 22:49

At the nursery I work at we take babies from 3 months. We don’t get many that age, but I’d say 85% start at just before 9 months.

BackforGood · 26/05/2021 23:15

If you are happy at 13months, then I can't see any reason why not at 9 months.
Any 'arguments against' would be the same for a 13month old as a 9 month old. If anything, 8 months might work better as many dc go through a separation anxiety thing between about 9 and 11 months which might make it a bit harder.

Casmama · 26/05/2021 23:27

Both of mine went at 9 months and were absolutely fine- better than some friends whose babies went at 12-13 months

mindutopia · 28/05/2021 12:47

Mine both started at 9 and 11 months and were absolutely fine - I was doing a long commute and not getting home until 7pm some nights (and still bf). I started at 3 months and my mum went back to work FT.

insancerre · 30/05/2021 09:16

I work in a nursery and have found the easiest age for babies to start is between 3 and 9 months
In fact, the younger ones find it easiest

Starlightstarbright1 · 30/05/2021 09:19

I am a cm. My youngest i have taken is 6 weeks. All of the children i have had have always adapted well. Some take longer than others to settle at drop off.

Restlessinthenorth · 30/05/2021 09:24

Mine went at 9 months. He settled quickly, loved going and had a great relationship with the lovely staff. He's now 9, well adjusted, confident, and happy, lovely little boy. He has friends in class who have been at nursery with him from day one and they are the best of friends

FTEngineerM · 30/05/2021 09:24

Ours started two days a week at 9m then went up to 3 days a week at 10.5m which he’ll remain at until I’m back on Mat leave in September when I’ll have him home all the time again.

He’s been fine, I don’t know if it’s made a difference developmentally because I don’t know what he would have been like without it but he’s still a happy chappy just like before he went. They all comment on him being smiley all the time. The first few times he went he cried at hand over and I was a mess but now he leaps across to them.

Undertheoldlindentree · 30/05/2021 09:24

Mine went to nursery full time (8 to 6pm) for five days a week at 6 months, 5 months and 16 months. All down to job and maternity leave options at the time. The first two settled easily. The third more clingy and took longer to settle in.

Parker231 · 30/05/2021 09:25

Mine went full time from aged six months as that was the normal maternity leave then. It was a lovely nursery and it was a good time in DC’s lives.

Ozanj · 30/05/2021 09:25

I work in a nursery and have babies as young as 3 months. 9 months is about the average where I am - but it is a London commuter town. I think whichever nursery you choose, you should pick one with at least 3-4 seperate rooms where 1 room is entirely for babies up to 12-18 months old. This set up means very young babies (a 9 month wouldn’t be included in this) can often be kept away from the older ones.

Mysterian · 01/06/2021 22:56

To work, yes.

MeadowHay · 01/06/2021 23:02

My DD started at 8.5 months as I had to return to work at 9 months as couldn't afford to take the unpaid part of mat leave and wanted to get her a bit settled before I actually went back to work. She was in 3 days a week 8-6. She settled quickly, gradually within a couple of weeks and soon grew to be very happy there. She's still there now and she's about to turn 3. I'm pregnant again and this next one won't be in nursery until they're almost 1 because our circumstances have changed so I am able to take a longer mat leave, but as PP say I'm anticipating that might mean worse separation anxiety to deal with.

Fairtatas · 01/06/2021 23:04

2 x 9 month starters here- both settled fine. Good luck.

tappitytaptap · 01/06/2021 23:07

My DS1 started at 8 months and settled brilliantly. DS2 was 11 months and similar. Lots of friends had difficulty settling over 1s.

Southwestrunningmum · 01/06/2021 23:11

Yes they will be fine, I think you’ll need to be fair to him and the nursery though and I doubt they’ll let you come and go to breast feed/for naps etc

Asiama · 01/06/2021 23:17

It depends on your baby. SIL's baby was fine at 9 months. In hindsight mine wasn't ready until closer to 18 months, but needs must. I would be surprised though if your nursery would let you pop in and out for feeds and naps, so bear that in mind.

DoAsYouWouldBeMumBy · 01/06/2021 23:20

Mine went at 9 months, which was a perfect age - settled much more easily than they would have done at 13 months, when there was a bit of a separation issue.

Moonlaserbearwolf · 01/06/2021 23:29

My second went from 9 months to a wonderful, small nursery (more like a childminder environment with about 10 children). She settled in much better than my elder child, who went to a larger nursery at 13 months.

Rather than worrying about the age of the child, I’d be more concerned about picking the best possible nursery. I wish I’d know about the second nursery when I was looking around for my elder child.

Psychgrad · 10/06/2021 07:51

I don’t like it personally and think it is too young, I realise I’m in the minority though. Children benefit from one or two close caregiver at this age and not by loads of different children. Maybe get a nanny so she could look after both of your children?

ivfgottwins · 10/06/2021 07:57

Maybe get a nanny so she could look after both of your children?

Do you realise how much a nanny costs?! They are a luxury only high earners can afford 🤷‍♀️

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