Nursery near work, but dd hates journey home...what would you do?

[josiebones]

DD (1 yo) has been at nursery , 3 days a week, near my work for over 6 months. She loves it, gets on well with staff and kids, and is generally settled.
But, while she is happy on the journey in (takes approx 1 hr), the journey home is a nightmare. Eventually she usually falls asleep. When we get home (7pm), she wakes, cries, screams, as we get her ready for bed, because she is overtired (she really suffers when over-tired). Last night she was hysterical.
Would you move her nursery closer to home? Is it really disruptive for a 1 year old to change nurseries? How much harm do you think it is doing her to get that upset 3 days a week?
We really don't know what to do, because the 4 days she isn't at nursery, she is a different child when getting her to bed.

tbh, it sounds like par for the course in terms of a working day! We live mins walk from ds's nursery and we get this response too! I think it is, as you say, overtiredness, combined with complete relief at seeing you - at which point they let it all out and are horrible!. I doubt a nursery nearer to home would make any differnce.

I'm not sure it's the journey that is causing her to be overtired. Is she napping properly at nursery? When DS was in nursery (2 days a week) we found that he was exhausted when he got home because he wasn't getting his proper naps when he was there.

You could be right. She often doesn't nap as well at nursery. At home she'll have 2 naps 9-10ish then 1.5 hrs in the afternoon, sometimes less.
At nursery she usually only has one nap, sometimes as little as 30 mins. Occasionally 1.5 hours. But it seems to make no difference.
The reason we are wondering about the journey is because she falls asleep, then of course we wake her when we get home, and she gets herself into a complete state, getting worse when we change her nappy and clothes.
Any suggestions for how we can deal with this to make the stress a little less for her? Was so upset last night. Feel like we are doing her some damage

my nursery is about 20 mins from home and DS does exactly the same thing. I guess if you put your DD in a closer nursery you would have to listen to the tantrums for so long!

Would it be feasible to pop her in a clean nappy and night clothes before she leaves nursery - either nursery staff or yourself? Then when you got home she could just be put straight to bed.

sorry that should have read would'nt

If she has evening meal at nursery, could you change her nappy/clothes at nursery so that when you get home you can put her straight to bed?

x-posted madamy

Great minds saadia and madamy!
DH suggested the same thing, so we are going to try this - I gave nursery her sleepsuit this morning, and we'll see what she is like tonight. Fingers crossed!
When do they grow out of this?!

good luck

DD1 went to nursery 2 days a week until she was 3.5 and we had a 20min journey to collect dd2 from my mum's. We'd leave Mum's after about 20mins and she always fell asleep on the way home - often before 6pm! I would just pop her straight to bed - only downside was that she'd wake at about 6am the next day! It does make for a nice quiet evening though lol!

I'd always say have the nursery nearer work, especially if that's an hour away from home. You could so easily get stuck in traffic with your DD "stuck" at nursery. Or if she's ill and you need to go and get her. Especially as she otherwise seems settles. Does she have a bath has part of her bed-time routine? I used to find a bath soothed and relaxed mine, no matter how ratty they were before they went in. Might be worth trying?

I think if you're happy with the nursery and she is settled leave her there, I think at around 12 months old it is probably the worst time to move them. Perhaps you should speak to the nursery and ask them to try and give her one long lunch time nap, they should be accommodating your daughters needs, if you try and does this at home too it should soon become the norm. HTH