Settling in at nursery

[Ellies]

Hi

I'd appreciate some advice, support, information. I have atarted my little boy who was 3 in August 2007 at a private nursery. I has a settling in perdiod two weeks agao where he gradually stayed for longer each day - he loved it and actually cried when we had to go home.

However last week he started properly - I have put him in 5 mornings a week from about 9.30-1pm. Things did not go well and by Thursday he was clinging to me, crying, begging me to stay and the nursery teachers had to loosen his grip and get him off me. he seemed to calm donw in abotu 5 minutes (I waited upstairs) but this mornign when i mentioned goimng he started to cry.
I am finding this very distressing - is this nromal? why did he go from being happy to being so upset? how long will he take to settle in?

Before this we was looked after by grandparents and went to playgroup most mornings. Given his behaviour this morning I didn't send him.

Help!!

Eleanor

Eleanor,

My DD goes to nursery 2 days a week while I work. The nearest experience I had was when DD moved rooms and cried when in the new room. It was totally unexpected by me and really upset me. The nursery manager prmoised it would pass and it did. I would suggest the following: firstly talk to the nursery to find out how he is when you are not there. If its all OK I would suggest that you set yourself a time limit - say a month, this was roughly how long it took for DD to settle completely in her new room, don't get into not sending him difficult I know but now he needs to think that you are all for nursery), talk about nursery in a really positive way and take him even if it breaks your heart, dont let on to him that you are upset and leave with a smile on your face and dont hang around where he sees you, go and hide and if possible go back and take a look at him when he cant see you to reassure yourself all is well. If the nursery staff are not concerned it is more than likely that he will be fine and it will be sorted in a months time. If not then you could consider removing him from that nursery or waiting until he is a bit older to try again. I really sympathise as it was horrid seeing DD so upset but if ita any help she loves nursery now. Only problem is she is about to change rooms again!