Behaviour since nursery trials

[veejayteekay]

Just looking for some advice or maybe (hopefully!) Reassurance that this will pass. I have a 2y3m boy who is starting nursery formally on 4 Jan

He's had 4 x 2 hour trial sessions ahead of Xmas to settle him in (I'd asked for additional given he's not used to being in anyone elses care throughout covid) and to my happy surprise it went fantastically. Even though I knew he's a confident quite outgoing little boy so I wasn't expecting bad waterworks, i was worried about what his reaction may be to being left, but he loved it. On each day so desperate to get in, it was a struggle to say goodbye because he was rushing in, he would be so excited after a trial and talk about it constantly and I could tell he'd really benefitted from seeing the other children. Each time was reported he was really well behaved, very polite and has adapted to it very easily (I had been a little worried as altho he's very friendly to other kids can be quite boisterous etc)

However...such a contrast with his behaviour at home since trials. Sounds trivial but lots of "go away" type phrases, and bad tantrums. He could previously hit sometimes when v frustrated but now tantrums almost always involve hitting and kicking and headbutting if he's really wound up. He's also doing loads of attention seeking stuff (he's always been a bit on the hyper side but it's really ramped up) - deliberately climbing on things he's not allowed to, running away when we're out, running up and down stairs when 9ur back is turned (he's not allowed unsupervised in stairs) and being a bit hyper/mean to the cat. Don't get me wrong he hasn't turned into the spawn of Satan! And some of the behaviour is just an extension of toddler stuff he already did BUT it does seem markedly more since these nursery trials

I was so happy he got on so well but I'm worried that this is now how has going to be (either copying behaviours from other kids) or because he feels upset somehow. He is v shortly going to be doing 4 full days and while I'm confident he will enjoy his time there, I'm worried what this means for the little.home time we'll have together

Please someone tell me this is normal/passes???

Sounds like 2-3 year behaviour to me. I would expect the nursery have encouraged independence so he is trying to work out if the same boundaries work at home. It could be related to settling in sessions. If I were you I would be praising the positive, even setting up tasks so he can achieve them and as much as possible ignore negative eg if he goes upstairs pick him up and bring him down without making much of a fuss. Have a look at 123 magic too there is a Facebook page and a book by Thomas Phelan.

It is unfortunately fairly normal for a 2 year old. The other day mine say, 'Go away! Leave me alone! I hate you!' because I was trying to get him undressed to get in the bath. Things he clearly has learned from older moody siblings. I wouldn't assume it had anything to do with spending 4 hours at nursery as they really is a minimal amount of time, but starting nursery can just disrupt routines, sleep, etc while they settle in, which can last a couple months. I would actually suspect it might have more to do with all the strangeness and disruption of Christmas more than anything. Mine are a bit of a nightmare at the moment. It's because they're stuck inside too much, not enough socialisation, too many treats they wouldn't normally have, routine is all a mess, etc.