Drop off advice

[owmn]

My daughter (24m) has just started nursery, and is really struggling with the separation from me.

I’m sure she’ll get used to it, I’ve been reassured she settles after 5/10 minutes, and she seems happy when I collect her/receive updates throughout the day, but I was wondering if anyone had any specific little tips or tricks for the handover?

At the moment, it’s hysterical crying and them picking her up whilst she reaches for me and screams. I’ve talked to her a lot about how I’ll always be back to get her, I try and be as quick as possible in partially settling her and saying goodbye, and we’re very positive when talking about it, asking about her day etc, it’s just the drop off is absolutely brutal, I’m struggling probably more than she is!

Is there anything anyone can suggest? She goes in with her favourite soft toy, but there’s just nothing else I can think of to try and make it easier on both of us.

You’re doing all the right things. Keep doing what you’re doing and she will get used to the transition. The key is that she is happy after a few minutes, if she was unsettled dor the whole session that would be different.

You could try moving to shorter sessions for a while. In my experience working with this age group, mornings only is ideal.

My youngest struggled with the transition to a new room that unfortunately coincided with 2 weeks when I wasn't able to drop him off, DP did it. What he needed was me to take him to the entrance of the room, say bye and give him a kiss then pass him to one of the room staff who walked away with him whilst saying hello to him. Watching me walk away caused upset but he was much better being taken to his favourite toy or friends by the carer. Where possible is was the same carer each time. Now he walks in without a glance.

Consistency is key. On days when they don't like the separation at least they know what's happening.

My DS has been like this but we spoke to the nursery and they have made him a sticker chart where he gets to put on a sticker if there are no tears at drop off.

I also let him decide what he wants to play with when he gets home before we leave the house and he picks it out so it is waiting for him when he gets home - this has coincided with drop offs being better but also the sticker chart so I'm not sure exactly what it was or whether it was a combination!

Hope it gets better but we have definitely found speaking to the nursery has helped.