Nursery costs in London, any tips?

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Hi there, I'm currently pregnant with our first child and I've looked into childcare costs in Bow, London where we live and have been shocked at the prices coming back - e.g. this morning - £1580 per month (plus an 18 month waiting list so we'd have to apply now). This is not far off our mortgage. My husband and I are on reasonable, professional salaries - or so I thought - but this cost is enormous.

We normally have about £1000 left over each month after bills/living costs etc which we'd normally put towards holidays etc but we bought our first flat in late 2018 and every penny over the past 1.5 years has gone into costs associated with this as it was a neglected ex-council flat in Bow (East London) so we have no savings and there are still house-related things we'd need to do or pay for before the baby is due. Also, we'd need to somehow need to save an extra £580 from our normal living expenses just to pay for nursery. We already don't have a car, rarely eat etc so I'm not sure where this money will come from.

We have no grandparents who could support with childcare. Are there any better options out there? I feel like we're taking on the impossible trying to have a child in London. We considered moving out back in 2018 when we bought our flat but we're not from the UK originally and if we left London we'd have zero friends or support network. Also, there are few jobs in our fields outside of London. I'm also now 40 (it took almost 20 years to get on the property ladder with current house prices) so it's not like we can put it off until we're earning higher salaries.

Any help appreciated, we don't know anyone with children in London.

Thanks!

@copperoliver wow - and you think I’m the rude person?? 😂

@jannier no, not really. My mother was a state school teacher, my dad was a scientist working in universities, they didn't earn much. My husband and I earn more than people in those people in those jobs now. We didn't take fancy holidays or eat out when we were growing up. The main thing was their housing was really cheap.

@copperoliver in fact if we were all sitting round a table I absolutely would say ‘have you been listening because your suggestion clearly isn’t helpful’ it’s not about being a ‘keyboard warrior’ all I said was read the posts before commenting? Pretty basic stuff for a message forum!

@Winterfishing apparently the Home Counties can easily be more than the deprived parts of central London!

Yes babies 0-2 will need all of your attention while they are awake. You cannot feasibly work from home and look after a young child unless you can basically not work during the day and work in the evening / during naptime (if they nap, which can be difficult to predict, and may only work in the pram / on you).

It is so expensive. Tax free childcare will help so look into that. See if your employer(s) offer any help or support like helping with a childcare search.

Some friends have au pairs which is a MUCH cheaper option but obviously they have to live with you! So you need space and the willingness to accommodate that.

It is only for a short period. Can you overpay your mortgage now and reduce your payments for a while?

@user1480880826 I think the 'working from home' whilst the baby is home a day a week won't work, even if it's both my husband working at home that day. It was suggested by someone who'd never looked after babies but it's becoming increasingly obvious it wouldn't work.

From all the comments, by far the most viable approach would be both compressing our hours and doing nursery 3 days a week as that is a big decrease in costs.

Aside from nursery costs, can anyone give a ballpark estimate as to how much we'd need to budget monthly for other costs such food/medicine/clothes/nappies, whatever else 0-2 year olds need?

Thanks for all the help everyone!
Rachel

@soontohavetwoundertwo we are currently overpaying (but only by 10%) and we'll drop back to standard, not sure if we can take a holiday from it but even a month off would be great during that first year

I'm way outside London (wales) and unfortunately the better nurseries here are also that much. Without a London uplift on salaries.

I work part time. Take all the tax free childcare for me and dh. Planned kids so they wouldn't both be in nursery at same time.

@user1488979639 the plan is definitely to leave London at the very latest before our child starts school but buying where we have was the most affordable option in 2018 factoring in travel costs, work and interest rates so we're here for now..

That’s a lot. Ours is 953.33 for four days a week. We pay 4/5ths of that as have the 20% govt tax thing.
I would look at all options. Childminder, nanny share etc. See if there are parenting groups on Facebook for your area and join eg Bow Parents, Bow mums and dads kind of thing.

@doadeer normally we have about £1000 left after living costs/bills. We've been using this for holidays, renovations etc so we could stop all of that and use it towards nursery.

Can't feasibly change jobs/careers now as the baby's due in September and we'll be relying on the maternity pay.

It seems like buckling in for 3 hard years is the only way to do it.

And ask around on there re childminder costs etc. We’re in London too but I think 953 for four days is pretty reasonable.

@Otter46 that does sound very reasonable. If we can get £1000 or under I would be happy with that

Childminders are more like £50pd so def worth considering. You also need to cast your net wider, we had to go to the next borough to find affordable available childcare. Also consider somewhere near your work

@MoodLighting yep, just at the start of the search really.

Just save as much as you can now before baby arrives and on MAT leave (well the paid part of it!) knowing that you will have to pay a lot on childcare for 0-2 year olds but then it gets cheaper once they hit 2. Can you put off any house expenses till then?

Agree that childminders can be a bit cheaper and compressing hours can save childcare costs.

Friends of mine who met on their MAT leave both reduced to working 4 days/ week and looked after each other's babies 1 day/ week so they only needed 3 days/ week nursery each.

I found I did not spend much on the paid part of my mat leave as I didn't have to pay for my tube pass, pret lunch, after work drinks etc.

It is difficult though, we moved out of London after having DC2 as we just could not afford to live there any more!

Nothing to add OP other than sympathy. East London here and pay £98 per day. Outrageous really but they do have really great hours 7am - 7pm. I don’t leave my dd in for 12 hours though but love the flexibility.

That cost is mind blowing. Looking online it seems that all the government ran nurseries have been closed although I’ve never come across one in my area.

A childminder here is quoting £5 an hour for full time place

www.localoffertowerhamlets.co.uk/organisations/27402-walsh-lorraine?term=

That website lists all the providers in the borough

Re the other child costs I don’t think that baby stuff costs more than your child benefit but that’s clothing from supermarkets, regular formula or nursing bras etc

Babies in themselves aren’t expensive especially if you’re happy to get some bits second hand for the bigger items. I got a great pram for £45!

Working from home is not a substitute for childcare!! A baby, toddler or preschool child will take up almost all your time, far more than you think.

I'm not sure if you will be eligible for all your child benefit based on your salary?

I find nappies are expensive and we bought pre made formula when he was close to one and my partner was doing the evening feeds and this was expensive but obviously you don't need to have that. They grow out of clothes so fast, just get basic stuff - I loved h&m for pjs etc.

In London baby groups are expensive so look for church type ones which are cheap. The app hoop is good for that.

Totally agree with others - 1) look for a childminder 2) try to make it just 3 days of paid care 3) sign up for tax free childcare.

We were lucky to find a childminder we really liked; 3 days a week for 800 quid.

Is your manager flexible/ understanding? Do you have colleagues who have to work around childcare requirements - can you ask around if others have flexi arrangements in place? Are you able to e.g. leave early once a week and take 3 hours of work home to do in the evening? That could mean you save half a day in childcare fees.

Is it feasible to go down to working 4 days a week? You get paid less, but you save the nursery fee and get precious time with your child. Or could you possibly negotiate temporarily changing your contract to 4 days a week, say for 6 months before easing yourself back to full time.

As for other outgoings, personally I've found it minimal so don't lose hope!! New clothes every season yes, but I like to shop around on ebay. Milk- if you breastfeed it's free! Food also costs every little extra (unless you have a picky eater who only wants the most expensive berries!!)

My friends who lived in your sort of area, both in public sector jobs, used a CM, one of them worked 4 days and the other started really early I seem to remember so could pick up at 5 not 6 which helped.
You might find that 3 days at a CM (if you both work 4 days - your DH has the right to request flexible working even if you can't see how he could work fewer hours, lots of parents do.) is more affordable as you'd be cutting your salary by 20% but your childcare costs by 40%.