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Nurseries

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Original poster

Stop sending them in!

69 replies

JustLikeJasper · 16/12/2019 19:46

My DS has been in nursery FT for 2 months he has had a cold pretty much since he started and today has been sent home for the 3rd time since he started with a high temperature.

Every morning queuing up to drop off i see kids clearly not well enough to be attending yet parents waving off their poorly kid knowing they are spreading germs!

Why can't parents be responsible and thoughtful of other kids/families when their child is unwell? Yes its a pain being off work and no we don't get paid but FFS stop sending your sick kids in!
Please and thank you 🤪

OP posts:

WhenYouCantRunYouCrawl · 16/12/2019 21:39

DD started nursery in September and has had three bouts of D&V since the October half term. No one else has had it in the house so I'm assuming she's got it from nursery. I've kept her off the required 48 hours after the last incident each time and as a result I've lost money because I'm self employed.

But I'm not judging anyone at the gate for it. It's just what happens when you get young kids together. It's just one of those things you have to deal with as a parent.

Original poster

JustLikeJasper · 16/12/2019 21:49

@RedWineIsFabulous as i said earlier i have never sent him to nursery knowing he was unwell or sent him in after having medicine. Why would i create this thread if i was one of 'those' parents?

OP posts:

harper30 · 16/12/2019 21:53

I sympathise, have an 18 month old who has been ill a lot since starting nursery, BUT, it's par for the course isn't it? We can't expect to send our kids to a care provider that takes in a load of other kids all in one building together and not deal with them getting germs. Like a PP said, you can't have endless time off work and if your kid has a cold/seems a bit iffy, it's far less painful to risk taking them to nursery than it is to call in sick, arrange your day/cover etc. And be made to feel guilty or not be paid. It's part and parcel of being working parents.
They're ill a lot from catching things from each other and that's how it goes. The only thing I'd get pissed off about is d&v and chickenpox and still sending them. Colds, other general 'illness', you just have to expect. Everyone's kids are ill a lot, even people who don't send them to nursery.

AudacityOfHope · 16/12/2019 22:04

Because OP you're judging others but not applying the logic to yourself. In your mind you know your kid was fine at drop off, but the other parents are wilfully dropping off ill kids.

They probably think the same of you: rationalise their actions while judging others harshly.

DinoSn0re · 16/12/2019 22:05

@JustLikeJasper you are missing the point that lots of PP’s have tried to make - you are, unwittingly or not, also sending your child to nursery whilst he is contagious/ill. You are presuming that other parents are doing so knowingly, whilst claiming that on each of the three occasions your son has fallen ill you have been unaware that he was not well. How do you know other parents were also not aware that their children would become more ill as the day progressed? It comes across as hypocritical.

You also won’t explain why you regard conjunctivitis as so much worse than a cold.

Booberella9 · 17/12/2019 01:32

OP makes no sense. Then backtracks to say doesn't include colds What illnesses are you talking about then?

user1471523870 · 17/12/2019 14:01

I totally get your concerns and, in principle, you are right. However the reason a child is in nursery is that parents need to work and that it's often difficult to understand at what stage of the illness the child is.
Also, it's unlikely the spread of germs will stop because you take your child home when unwell. So many different bugs with so many different incubation periods and different immune systems....

My personal experience has been horrific for the first few months, but then it got better. We now have at least one cold every other week, resulting in baby constantly having runny nose/cough. However temperature/diarrhea/vomit happens way less often.

And, when it happens, it's not like I can pick him up a second after he vomits or that the nursery can spot it within minutes from the onset. It means the baby is contagious even before showing signs of illness.... If there are another 10 babies in the same room, you can bet it's difficult to really keep the germs out....

Fandabydosey · 17/12/2019 22:57

@Constantlurker did you know it is illegal for employers to give you a warning for looking after your sick child?

On another point I am currently off work because I picked up a bug from the children I work with. If all the staff get sick the nursery won't be staffed and all children will have to be at home. Child sickness is unavoidable and employers have a legal obligation to factor this in. There are lots and lots of parents who send their child in ill saying 'I am working from home today as I am ill, they had calpol this morning so if they aren't right ring me'. This is an almost weekly occurance. High temperature are really dangerous for young children. They can have febrile convulsions. To those saying that it's OK for sick children to be in nursery, do you know how tiring nursery is for well children? Play for children is the equivalent of work for you only they don't have the same understanding that this sickness will pass nor can they articulate how they are feeling. They are at nursery because it is your choice not theirs. Sick children need their parents not a paid stranger. Also I now can't see my dad over Christmas because he has a compromised immune system and this bug I have could kill him. It's not fair that I miss Christmas family time because I caught a bug from work. Plus I don't get paid for being off sick. These children are so little and vulnerable please think about them.

surreygirl1987 · 18/12/2019 23:21

Surely common sense should prevail? I agree with the majority of replies!

theSnuffster · 19/12/2019 21:38

I work in a baby room. You soon get a feel as to which parents would drop their child off knowing they aren't well enough to be there. Most parents aren't like that. Often a child can seem perfectly fine first thing in the morning and by snack time they're really not themselves, high temperature etc. We can't expect parents to predict the future! It does make us cross when parents knowingly bring in their poorly children though- especially as we have children with compromised immune systems.

DullPortraits · 22/12/2019 19:25

Its not so much the children but staff you need to worry about going in poorly.. my sister works at a nursery and they hate the staff phoning in sick as are often too short staffed to accommodate absences so they all go in with D and V, heavy colds etc and are rarely sent home! Its awful. She said its the same at most nursery's she has worked at.

Lindy2 · 22/12/2019 19:33

I agree with you OP.

I'm a childminder and several times I have nearly packed in my job because children who should be at home are dropped off at my home and spread their illnesses to me and my family.

It's generally the same families that do it. What also annoys me is when they arrive in the morning and seem ok, then bang on 3 hours later the calpol wears off and they are clearly not well.

I do get that the parents need to work but it really isn't fair on the poorly children or the people they also make ill.

Littlejayx · 22/12/2019 19:45

You are 100% one of those parents

Practice what you preach gal

Original poster

JustLikeJasper · 22/12/2019 21:38

@Littlejayx would you like the telephone number of my sons nursery who can confirm he has not been in since Monday last week because he's not been well? Oh wait you obviously know me so well already to be 100% sure 🙄🙄🙄🙄

OP posts:

surreygirl1987 · 22/12/2019 22:00

Wowwww calm down! 😂

welshweasel · 22/12/2019 22:15

Personally I think it’s fine to send them to nursery with a cough/cold/conjunctivitis so long as they are reasonably happy in themselves. Our nursery (as most do) follow the public health guidance for exclusion periods - obviously 48 hours for d&v (which makes complete sense), but no exclusion for HFM, conjunctivitis etc.

If I kept mine off every time they were snotty or coughing I’d never go to work! Kids have frequent viral infections, it’s how their immune systems get built up.

If either of them was unwell enough for me to have to keep them off nursery then I would, but I’m not going to miss work unnecessarily.

surreygirl1987 · 23/12/2019 07:05

Completely agree @welshweasel

Doodar · 23/12/2019 07:16

I share a school drop with a family, the amount of times I pick up their child when she should be in bed is beyond 10 fingers. I know it can’t be helped but hard going on the child.

lilyrayne · 23/12/2019 07:38

Just wait til they start full time school 🙄 gets even worse then : nits, worms , sickness bugs some parents just don't listen to rules and don't give a shit

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