being pathetic about dd starting nursery - please reassure

[jujumaman]

Dd1 is down to start at a little nursery (just 20 children at most) three mornings a week in September. She'll be 2 1/2 and I think she needs time with other children for all the obvious reasons. It seems a lovely place, but am in a spin as I go back to work then after maternity leave with dd2 and our nanny who has been with us since dd1 was tiny has just announced she wants to leave before Christmas. My worry is - with arrival of a new sister, me employing a new nanny, will starting nursery be too much for her? She's a happy little child but quite sensitive (I'm sure all mums think the same) and has always been at home with either me/nanny so not that used to other kids, though she does love being around them - especially older ones. I'll be able to personally settle her in the first few sessions as work from home and am quite flexible. Should I defer her starting a term so she gets used to new nanny etc or am I just being totally hormonal breastfeeding mother? Any advice appreciated. Thank you

I would have thought there is enough of a gap for her to adjust to nursery prior to the nanny leaving, so would leave it as it is. If you find she doesn't adjust well or is unsettled by the nanny leaving, I assume you could take her out if you wanted to, could you?

Try her at the nuresry, if it's too much for her, take her out!

I'm sure she'll be fine though, and love having the other kids to play with.

Of course will take her out, it's just an expensive private nursery so would rather not! But tightwad as I am, obviously dd's happiness comes first. Question is - how many weeks is a normal settling in period ie do I take her out after a fortnight/a month/ a term?

I think it takes a while. It took ds (who started going to nursery for two mornings a week at 5 months) about a month to start settling in. I think going full-time from the word go would have made it quicker. I would say you probably need to give it at least 6-8 weeks, although I imagine it might take a bit longer at that age.

I have to warn you though that it was absolutely horrendous for me the first few times I dropped him off. But I know from when I leave him with his nanny two days a week that he will howl for about 5 minutes after I leave and is then happy for the rest of the day.