Need to leave at 7, childcare not open until 7:30...

[ElphabaTheGreen]

Hi all.

DH will be working away three days a week, every week from next year. My working hours are 8-4, and I have to leave home at 7am to get to work on time, so DH drops our DCs off at nursery and breakfast club, both of which open at 7:30.

The only way I can change my working hours to accommodate this is to use annual leave, which doesn't really appeal. I can't work later to make up for lost hours in the morning.

We don't have family, friends or neighbours who can take over the drop off to enable me to still leave at 7am.

WIBU to ask the girls in DS2's nursery to see if we could pay one/some of them to cover the 7am-7:30 gap and take them in for me, or is this cheeky? The nursery is close to our home and most of the nursery girls live very locally. Or are there alternative childcare services available that would cover this (pitifully short and awkward but crucial) period of time? We're in the Greater Manchester area if this helps you point me in the right direction.

Thanks in advance!

Look for a nursery near a hospital as they might open at 6.30 for people who start work at 7am?

DS2 would conk out in the car on the way home and be up until midnight!

It also doesn't solve the issue of breakfast club not opening until 7:30 (can't change schools).

I work in a hospital. Nearest nurseries are all 7:30 starts.

Could you perhaps reduce your financial commitments so you don't feel compelled to work such long hours? Just a thought.

I've done similar but you should check with the nursery first. Some forbid it, in theory for safeguarding reasons but I think it's actually that they have had bad experiences with training up staff who then get poached to be nannies.

Please check with the nursery manager before asking any of the staff. It is not good practice to allow staff to provide extra babysitting.

We've got a good relationship with the nursery as both boys have been there full time since they were tinies so I have no qualms about asking.

Can't reduce my financial commitments, sadly. We have to support my mum who is disabled so downsizing is not an option, mortgage being our biggest financial commitment. Outside of this, we are exceptionally frugal.

I know that a lot of the girls do evening and weekend private sitting for children at the nursery. I just wasn't sure if asking for mornings was 'a thing'. At the very least I would imagine they could point us in the right direction even if they can't do it themselves for whatever reason.

Could you work through lunch break on the 3 days? You say could use annual leave but presume you mean for that hour. So work may be ok with you being late and this way you can make up most of the time?

There's certainty no harm in asking the nursery staff.

I know at DS2's nursery, they've previously said on the nursery FB page and via a sign on the notice board that some staff are available for babysitting out of hours, so some nurseries do allow their staff to do this sort of thing.

Alternatively, would a childminder be an option?

Could you go in 45 mins early the two days your dh is around if all else fails?

What's your husband doing to find a solution?

There is no harm in asking, in all the nurseries my children went to the staff were happy to babysit, there may well be one of them who would welcome a regular extra bit of income without sacrificing their evenings or weekends.

If it's only 30mins on 3 days can't you ask to start late and reduce your lunch break? I don't see how if you can't afford to reduce your hours by 1.5 per week you would be able to afford 3 hours extra childcare? My daughters key worker used to do some babysitting outside of nursery but it was c£10ph

You could ask the girls who work in the nursery - but expect to pay a decent whack for that extra time, because it's so early - so at least £10 for that half hour. You really need to make it worth their while.

Do be aware that their employer might not allow it.

If it doesn't work out, then childminder is best bet as they can be more flexible - although many won't start at 7.

Tricky situation - it always is those few minutes that make a difference isn't it! My local nursery started at 8, but I needed to drop off by 7.45....so the 15 mins was a deal breaker. I think actually that an 8am opening is too late for many working parents and given time, more will have to open earlier.....doesn't help you though!

I used to do this for a family when I was a nursery nurse. Slightly different hours - nursery started at 7am, they dropped baby to me at 5:30am. It was fine. I didn't have to drive anyone to school but wouldn't have been able to then anyway, I was too young to drive. I didn't mind though, and the extra money was nice as nursery work is pretty poorly paid!

A childminder to drop them both might work and you can drop breakfast club to offset the cost?

Another one here who is wondering why this has all fallen to you?

How old are your children?

I would look at getting an au pair I think. Yes they need a room so might involve kids sharing more for space, but it would be cost effective and save loads of time.

You only pay per family for an au pair. So instead of paying extra nursery and breakfast clubs and afterschool you can pay just one person. Get au pair to do 7-9am and 3-6pm. That way you can leave at 7am, they can get everyone ready for school and nursery, and drop everyone off by 9am. Then can collect from school at 3pm and collect from nursery by 4pm. Meaning you need 3hrs less at nursery each day, no school care, and you can come straight home.

And id certainly approach work to see if there is a solution. Approach with several possibilities that they could consider - you working through lunch, doing a slightly longer day on days DH is around, using annual leave etc etc. Ask them if there are any flexibilities they can offer to make it workable, given your family circumstances.
Do you work for a large or small firm? How are they about this kind of thing?

Because we've only just started thinking about this in the last couple of days and I thought I'd see if anyone on here has any ideas...? He's not off at the pub while I'm touting for nannies on a street corner.

Jeez, the negativity of this place boggles the mind sometimes.

I would definitely ask. Our nursery girls offer babysitting privately (advertised through the nursery) and I bet this would be doable if we needed it.

Are the only working hours options 8-4 or 9-5? Is 8.30-4.30 not an option as sounds like that would suit perfectly...?

Is it essential that your DH works away those three days? What does he suggest? Why is this your problem to sort out???

It's not us being negative op. At no point have you said that he is in any way bothered or interested in finding a solution. You've only said about you doing it.

We assume from that he isn't giving any help or support in the problem which is entirely of his causing.