Should I complain to Ofsted?

[mcnoodle]

A while ago I found out that the nursery my 1yo ds goes to had given a key to a parent. I didn't feel 100% comfortable with this as it seems to me like they've set a precedent that could mean lots of keys being issued which ultimately could put security at risk.

Being very british I had a very informal chat with the manager to raise my concern. She told me that the owner had given this parent a key after receiving numerous complaints from her about the gate (which is electronic and very tempermental).

The following day I called from work to see how ds was getting on. The owner answered and asked if I was the parent who had complained about the key. When I said 'yes' she responded 'well I don't actually understand why you felt you had to complain'. I was pretty shocked by this, even more so when she went on to tell me she didn't have to justify her decision as it was 'her' nursery. It was a horrible, pretty aggressive phone call and I was really upset by it.

I wrote a letter telling her how I felt about the key and about the unprofessional way she had dealt with my 'complaint'.

I received a letter in response reiterating her position. She does not feel the need to justify her decision to me as it is her nursery. The letter is very arrogant in tone and basically leaves me feeling utterly powerless.

I want to take ds out as the whole episode has made me feel that I have no voice as regards his care.

Should I complain to Ofsted? What else could I do?

Is the key to the actual nursery building or just for an outside gate?

Agree that owner's attitude was appalling. Never considered complaining about ds's nursery so don't know complaints procedure - perhaps if you want to make things worse you should ask the owner, that should pi*s her off a bit. But seriously, if no one on here knows, try Council website - via Education I guess...

But not sure why you don't trust parents to come into nursery? Security at ds's nursery is key code and finger print controlled - so means that parents can come and go and don't have to wait for reception to let them in. We are pretty trustworthy I think.

The key is for an external gate. I'm sure that one parent with a key is not going to seriously jeopardise safety, but lots of keys could. A key code and finger print can't be lost or stolen. I don't know...the initial conversation wasn't a big deal - I just wanted to raise something that I wasn't totally happy about. It's the way she has taken it so personally and been so unprofessional and lacking in sensitivity that really bothers me.

This is the first time I've said anything negative to the nursery and I am freaked out by the reaction. Did think about asking for a copy of complaints procedure. I wonder whether one exists.

As far as I know every nursery should have an official complaints procedure. Sounds like yours doesn't or it wasn't followed. You could complain to ofsted, I think you have a valid point - was the parent who was given the key cleared by the criminal records bureau for example? If the nursery owner had gven the key for her home that's different, but what she has done could potentially impact on the safety of your child. Also it sounds like you didn't actually 'complain',you just raised your concerns as a responsible parent.

If my nursery's owner spoke to me that way I'd seriously consider moving DS, fortunately they've never been anything but friendly and helpful. Let me know ifyou want a recommendation forone in Lancaster!

Sorry mcnoodle, good point about possibility of key being lost, I'd not thought about that.

Not at all sure about angle of 'has parent had CRB check?' - given that all the parents will be allowed in the building...

Jamisam - I pay the nursery to look after my DS with qualified staff who have been throroughly checked out. I'm sure the majority of parents are totally trustworthy but unfortunately not everyone is, just because people have kids doesn't make them nice/honest. I don't want to upset anyone but that's just how I feel.

I think the issue though is more the owner's attitude to the complaint - it should have been handled with professionalism and it wasn't.

I'd think they should be fixing the gate, rather than giving out keys. It does seem weird to give a key to one parent but not all.

And as others have said, the owner's response to your concerns is bizarre and rude. But then, I'm a big fan of non-profit community-run childcare ...

Sorry cross posted with you. Not sure how other nurseries work, DS has been to 2 though. At both all parents are signed in/out by staff so no-one is on site without them knowing. If someone had a key they'd have access to the children without using that system - that would concern me.

Oohh lovely lancaster - I went to school in Bentham. Now live in the baking south - dh won't budge from his mates!

I wanted some opinions because I can understand how my concern could just be middle class paranoia - but surely a decent service would be able to handle the occassional over wrought first time parent with a bit of sensitivity. And then I think that the best way to have dealt with the problem in the first place should have been to fix the gate not hand out keys. I'm pretty sure if I asked for a key I wouldn't get one.

Am just not the complaining type as a rule - stiff upper lip and all that...

That is another concern - there is no signing in book. Often in the morning, because the gate is so temperamental it is just left open.

There are other concerns that I have about the owner. For example closing windows on a boiling hot day because a neighbour had complained about noise - babies boiling. She blamed the closed windows on the girls - simply not true.

I'm gonna take him out. I just don't feel comfortable any more.

NQC - how can I find non-profit nurseries in my area? Do I have to go to CIS or SureStart?

I think that sounds like the right thing to do - honestly, closing the windows on a hot day? My nursery manager is considering going to the expense of installing aircon because she's so concerned about the little ones even though that would come out her profits - she has the right priorities!

No signing in/out procedure would definitely concern me too, we have signing in/out, passwords for people who don't regularly pick up DS, and the nurseries small enough for us to be known by first name by all the staff.

We only really realised how different nurseries could be when we changed DS from one in Preston to his current one as it was nearer home. We were very happy with the first one but the second one was even better! If you do change nurseries go and visit at least 3/4 and read their ofsted reports. You could also post asking for mumsnetters in your area to see if tere are any recommendations.

Good luck - definitely think you're in the right

PS - baking up here today too so even living in the north hasn't saved us this time

Thanks liquidclocks - it's always nice to be right!

Have been to see one other nursery which I liked because it was more secure, the staff were older and had been there for ages, good ofsted report. Am going to look at a couple more though llike you suggest.

Will I ever find a place that I walk into and think 'yes this is perfect'? Or should I just watch out for flying pigs?

I'd talk to your local CIS. Our non-profit nursery is now part of a children's centre, I think.

But DS2 now goes to a non-profit parent-run childcare co-op, which is another sort of beast altogether.

I don't think "perfect" is possible in childcare, but you do need to find somewhere you're happy with. A rude barmy annoying owner who says it is "her" nursery wouldn't be acceptable to me, either.