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In a dilemma re nurseries

4 replies

NewChoos · 25/06/2012 11:36

DS 15mo has been attending my work nursery 3 days a week for 6 months, it took a while for him to settle but he now seems happy there (mostly doesn't cry on drop off etc).
But it's a 40 minute commute on a train into central London. We leave the house at 0615 and we're not home until 7.
We are thinking of changing nurseries because:
I feel terrible that we have to wake him in the morning.
He's getting home late (although he has dinner at nursery, milk on the train with me and then goes straight to bed and it doesn't seem to bother him).
He's getting a busy train with me and I get a few Shock looks although he is actually very good on the train (we read books).
We will be TTC soon, I am not sure I can cope with morning sickness and the commute and DS.
Also, not sure if catching the train in A/W will mean more coughs and colds
Reasons not to change:
I am very happy with the nursery and they are really flexible about the days DS goes.
We have looked at quite a few nurseries and have not found one as nice -although we are going to so a 2nd visit to the best one so far but I still feel hesitant about it.
I don't want to unsettle DS.

Would really welcome some opinions, I would not be moving him if the commute was shorter. I don't want to use a child minder atm.
My options are:
Stay where we are (I could look at driving possibly in the winter months and if I get awful nausea, would cost more but want to do what's best for DS) and ignore the Shock looks forom some commuters.
Stay where we are and change working hours to finish earlier (or start later, although feel the early start and quieter train is easier to manage).
Change to another nursery and just move him back if we are unhappy after a few months.

OP posts:
suburbandweller · 25/06/2012 16:33

If your DS is happy I wouldn't move him unless you really can't stick the commute with him any more - I certainly wouldn't pay attention to other commuters as long as you aren't causing a nuisance! Some things to think about are:

  1. If your DS was at a nursery near to your home, would you be able to drop him off and collect him at the times you need to? If you don't get home until 7 now, it suggests you would need to be leaving work much earlier to collect your DS before the nursery closes (most open no later than 6.30pm). You will also presumably need to get into work later as 7.30am tends to be the earliest start for nurseries.

  1. If you can deal with the above, will your DS be missing out on time with you? It sounds as though you have a nice time together reading stories on the train. Will you have as much time to spend with him if you let him sleep later in the mornings and have to rush home from work to collect him from nursery at the latest possible time?

  1. Please don't underestimate the benefit of being close to your DS if there's ever an issue - whether that is down to him being unwell and you needing to collect him, or the trains being delayed/cancelled. My DS is in a nursery near to home while I work in London around an hour's commute away (on a good day). That feels like a million miles when I really need to get home to him quickly, or when I get stuck on a train.

  1. Three days a week of being woken up early isn't that much in the grand scheme of things - your DS has 4 more days to catch up on sleep. If he doesn't grumble you shouldn't feel guilty.

  1. If your DS has managed to get past the initial round of nursery settling in illnesses, you have nothing to worry about on the train front. His immune system should be super-reinforced by now!

So really, I reckon it comes down to whether you will be able to manage when pregnant. You might not get morning sickness, so I wouldn't change your routine around on that basis Smile
NewChoos · 25/06/2012 20:59

Thanks so much for the reply. It was so helpful, I really appreciate you taking the time and you've helped us make a decision - we are very good at procrastinating - so I think we are going to keep him where he is and reassess later if needed.
Thanks again :)

OP posts:
suburbandweller · 26/06/2012 09:36

Glad to have helped Smile

chaz27 · 29/06/2012 21:32

Failing that perhaps consider looking into wraparound childcare, they cater from 6am to 11pm if you were to go down the route of moving nurseries.

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