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Advice for a friend - tears :(

6 replies

friedfrog · 30/04/2012 12:25

Hi All

My friend is getting really anxious about her Daughter.

She will be 3 at the end of May and has been in full time nursery since she was 9 months old. Apart for the occasional tears when she is being dropped off she has been ok.

She moved "rooms" at nursery about 2 months ago and since is getting really upset and clinging to her Mum or Dad (they are seperated). From the second she gets up she says "no school" it is heart breaking.

Mum does not over compensate and nor does Dad, they just carry on with their routine (they obviously reassure her). Whilst she is at nursery she is fine no tears and gets on happily with other children. There are no tears at collection either. She has raised this with the Matron too.

Could it be the nursery?
Could it be that she is confused as to whom she will be staying with (they have a very solid rountine of who has her and when this is the same every week)
Could it just be a phase?

Any help gratefully received.


OP posts:
insancerre · 30/04/2012 15:43

What sort of nursery has a matron? Nurseries shold be welcoming, nurturing places where children are treated as individuals, according to their individual needs.
I guess that she is not coping with the move to the next room. She may just need a while for her to cope with the transition. Maybe she hasn't yet clicked with her key-person, assuming she has a key-person that is?
Maybe she could take in something from home, like a cuddly toy, that she can have with her.
I am sure it is just a phase and she willet used to the new routine soon.

ewaczarlie · 30/04/2012 15:46

Even the most confident kids can become clingy but I would raise it with the nursery. When my DS moved classes and left behind his favourite teacher he was unhappy. Eventually he settled and then a little later on his fav teacher moved into his class and he's very happy now (even though he's now found a couple more fav teachers just in case)

tethersend · 30/04/2012 15:53

When did her parents separate?

friedfrog · 30/04/2012 20:22

Thanks all, for the record it is a lovely nursery and the staff are very sweet.

The nursery are aware of it but are baffled.

Her parents separated when she was about 8 months.

Does she just give it time?

OP posts:
hardboiledpossum · 02/05/2012 17:50

Is she positive that her child is happy whilst there in the day?

yummymummyali · 03/05/2012 12:03

Sounds like she's either not dealing with the change of rooms well or this is attention seeking behaviour. She's three so is becoming aware of the situation of mum n dad not being together. I'd say tell mum n dad to carry on as's Just a phase x

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